the embolic case.

albums i dug in 2k11 (in a particular order)

2011-12-31T14:36:00.000-05:00

a couple of months ago, i had lofty dreams of making a 64-album tournament bracket and writing lengthy (and undoubtedly humorous) match-up breakdowns (like bon iver vs. liturgy!) that would eventually lead to the 'best album of 2011.' i realize now that this will not come to pass. 2k11 is mercifully on its deathbed and, following what has become the overarching theme of my year, i'm just going to have to 'readjust expectations.' thus, what follows is simply a list of the albums from this year that i found to be 'the most awesome' in some kind of ordered fashion. there aren't any explanations or any mathematical equations to back it up, but if you would like a detailed justification for why an album appears/does not appear on the list (or just want to argue), send me a handwritten request via the u.s. postal service by february 14, 2012. cheers and c u in 2k12.

30. Male Bonding: Endless Now
29. Panda Bear: Tomboy
28. Big Troubles: Romantic Comedy
27. Antlers: Burst Apart
26. Julian Lynch: Terra
25. Battles: Gloss Drop
24. Neon Indian: Era Extraña
23. James Blake: s/t
22. Young Prisms: Friends for Now
21. Stephen Malkmus + the Jicks: Mirror Traffic
20. Iceage: New Brigade
19. Atlas Sound: Parallax
18. Unknown Mortal Orchestra: s/t
17. Beirut: The Rip Tide
16. Times New Viking: Dancer Equired
15. Toro y Moi: Underneath the Pine
14. Horrors: Skying
13. Youth Lagoon: The Year of Hibernation
12. Shabazz Palaces: Black Up
11. Hammer No More the Fingers: Black Shark
10. Gauntlet Hair: s/t
09. Cymbals Eat Guitars: Lenses Alien
08. Pure X: Pleasure
07. Cloud Nothings: s/t
06. Mikal Cronin: s/t
05. Los Campesinos!: Hello Sadness
04. Yuck: s/t
03. Fair Ohs: Everything is Dancing
02. Fucked Up: David Comes to Life
01. Real Estate: Days

(favorite)/(best) albums of 2k10

2011-01-02T18:14:00.000-05:00

Even though it’s barely dead, 2k10 will definitely end up being an underrated year I think. There was nothing earth shattering (i.e. ‘summer of chillwave,' new Panda Bear album, etc.), but that doesn’t mean it wasn’t good. So, I decided to make a list of my ‘top’ 25 albums, which doesn’t even include stuff I liked from Male Bonding, Best Coast, Woods, Tokyo Police Club, etc., but I gotta stop somewhere. Because people hate reading things these days I decided to keep my reviews to 5 words or less. RIP 2k10 4evr.

25. MGMT: Congratulations

You probably hate this album.

24. Sleigh Bells: Treats

Ideal car commercial music.

23. Perfume Genius: Learning

I like being creeped out.

22. Toro y Moi: Causers of This

Chillwave will never die.

21. Girls: Broken Hearts Club EP

Sad, shuffling, twangy American rock.

20. Weekend: Sports

Slumberland will never die.

19. Kanye West: My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy

Training manual for megalomaniacs.

18. Broken Social Scene: Forgiveness Rock Record

Dad rock for the masses.

17. Caribou: Swim

Pulsating jumble of swirling sands.

16. morning benders: Big Echo

Like beaches and green grass.

15. LCD Soundsystem: This is Happening

Old people can still shake.

14. Tame Impala: Innerspeaker

Riding Australian psych rocks waves.

13. Avi Buffalo: s/t

Classic rock, but young/haunted.

12. Sufjan Stevens: The Age of Adz

Sometimes you just got it.

11. No Age: Everything in Between

More melody, less fuzz.

10. Wavves: King of the Beach

Pairs nicely with 4LOKO (RIP).

9. Abe Vigoda: Crush

Sinister echoes with angular bounce.

8. Los Campesinos!: Romance is Boring

Perverse comedy of twentysomething-dom.

7. Arcade Fire: The Suburbs

I grew up here.

6. Someone Still Loves You Boris Yeltsin: Let It Sway

Power pop is my heroin.

5. Big Boi: Sir Lucious Left Foot: The Tale of Chico Dusty

Ridiculous rhymes and bodacious beats.

4. Harlem: Hippies

Blurry/drunken/nearly poignant schlock.

3. Beach House: Teen Dream

Watery and reverent house music.

2. Deerhunter: Halcyon Digest

Everything finally falls into place.

1. Women: Public Strain

Buried ideas work best. (RIP?)

LIST: Best Albums of the Decade (according to me)

2009-12-31T17:19:00.000-05:00

I remember vividly the last album I listened to before the 20th century came crashing down into a pile of rubble at the feet of a monster known as Y2K. Just before my family headed to a friends’ house for a New Years’ party, I could be found lying on my bed, lights off, headphones on, discman spinning Fiona Apple’s When the Pawn… (cool). I don’t know what I was thinking about, but I do know that those songs were rotating in my head when I saw the ball drop and prayed the world’s computers didn’t crash and when I ran out onto the golf course behind my friends’ house to see fireworks light up the January sky.
At some point earlier this year, I set out to document the decade in music as I have experienced it since the lights went out on the party that was 1999. What follows are 35 albums that I believe were the best. Many other albums I’ve heard were also good (and there are admittedly many great ones I never heard at all), but these albums have the unique characteristics of being ‘good' and are notable because they have somehow had an impact on my life. All in all, I’ve found it’s been a pretty amazing decade for music, despite the fact that a great deal of my time was spent listening to bands that never existed in it (Pavement, Archers of Loaf, etc.). I understand this list seems disjointed, inconsistent, and puzzling, but such is life, such was the decade. Soak up the circularity and enjoy.

35. Demon Days: Gorillaz (2005)
I cannot think of any other group that mixes rock, R&B, hip hop, political commentary, and cartoons any better. Damon Albarn is somehow still an absolute genius. While I wasn't blown away with the ubiquitous lead single, "Feel Good Inc.," the rest of the album, including "Kids with Guns" and "DARE," are excellent. It's an admittedly over-the-top record, with choirs, guest musicians, etc, but it all feels justified when the songs are this good and the vague concept concerning the future of the planet/end of the world is this intriguing.

34. Fevers and Mirrors: Bright Eyes (2000)
I consider the ability to induce feelings of joy, fear, sadness, and nausea simultaneously to be very unique--but somehow this album evokes those feelings in me. I could barely listen to it at first because its haunting trembles troubled me, but as I listened more, I realized how good this album which focuses on clocks, calendars, and scales really is. The album is centered around forlorn frustration, yet once the hiss of childhood audio tapes and faux radio interviews die out and "A Song to Pass the Time" appears at the end of the album, there is a calm peace about the whole thing that so accurately captures adolescence it's frightening.

33. A Lesson in Crime: Tokyo Police Club (2006)
Yes, this is a 16-minute, 7-song EP, but I could not discount it considering the fact that it has been one of the discs I played most this decade. Though I enjoyed their debut full-length album released in 2008, I found this shorter, faster, looser release to be far superior. It is paranoid, shaky, and full of handclaps. In just a short EP, the band feels fully-formed and develops a buoyant sound that's unique and exciting.

32. Sea to Shining Sea: Love As Laughter (2001)
In my high school mind, the best way to find out about new bands was to mine a record label's website and listen to samples from all the bands on the label's roster. For various reasons, the label I hung onto most strongly during that time was Sub Pop. I tried out a song from Love as Laughter (I think it was "Temptation Island") and quickly had to haul myself to some record store in Georgetown to find the record I often referred to as the 'pink album.' It's a roughly produced record that fuses driving rock, psychedelia, and scuzz into something I still can't help but want to listen to. This album has somehow achieved 'old standby' status in my mind.

31. The Meadowlands: The Wrens (2003)
This record is the music of frustration and a perfect album to listen to in the car. Songs like "Happy" are constructed perfectly to build and release at just the right moment. There is something in the honesty in these songs of heartache that most anybody could relate to. It is astonishingly engaging from the cricket chirps of "The House that Guilt Built" all the way to the wails over the piano of "This Is Not What You Had Planned," which is pretty exceptional for an hour-long album. They tell me a new Wrens record may appear in 2010, which would assuredly be a great start to the next decade.

30. Remember the Night Parties: Oxford Collapse (2006)
This band is another gem from the Sub Pop roster, whom I fortunately got to see before they broke up in 2009. The record fits very well with the second half of the decade for me, as its subject matter is indicative of the transition from youth to adulthood. They have a kind of angular throwback indie sound that I was oft longing for this decade. "Please Visit Your National Parks" would be for me one of the top 10 songs of the decade, easily.

29. Who Will Cut Our Hair When We're Gone?: The Unicorns (2003)
I cannot think of any band that had a aesthetic this decade similar to The Unicorns. They had a mythical, mystical quality about them, which is fitting for a band named after a mysterious imaginary creature. It is difficult to walk the line between kitschy joke and dead-on seriousness as well as the band does on this album. Everything is jangly and weird and funny and almost childish, yet a lot of the songs focus on sickness, death, and, well, ghosts. Though I was put off by the band at first, once I 'got' it, I wasn't able to put it down.

28. Whatever People Say I Am, That's What I'm Not: Arctic Monkeys (2006)
It would be easy to overlook this band as just an overhyped British dance rock band that basically writes songs about going out, drinking, and meeting girls. While much of that is still true, now that the dust has settled, it appears the songs really are incredibly strong and are able to weather whatever hype surrounded the album back then. Regardless of how I may look on the dancefloor, I can't help but want to be on one with the rocking danceable rhythms of this album. It has just just enough muscle and just enough cleverness to make it stand out amongst other British bands of similar form this decade.

27. Stephen Malkmus: Stephen Malkmus and the Jicks (2001)
This is not a Pavement record, but it seems closer to one than any of the other S.M. + Jicks albums from this decade. Sure, S.M.'s lyrics focus more on narrative and the album doesn't twist and turn like you would expect a Pavement record to, but it's still S.M. and all the songs are still catchy and smart. The slowly drifting "Church on White" and lazy step of "Pink India" have fit so perfectly with the nascent warmth of spring that such time of year would now feel odd without them. I don't know if this was much of a step forward for my musical hero, but there must be something worthy in this album since I became overwhelmingly obsessed with it in 2001, 2004, and then again in 2009.

26. 100 Days, 100 Nights: Sharon Jones and the Dap-Kings (2007)
This album sounds like it was recorded in another time. It could easily sit alongside some of the best Motown records of the 1960s and most people wouldn't be able to tell the difference. The songs have the classic funk/R&B instrumentation and passionate, soulful vocals from Sharon Jones. I saw this group in Finland (yes, Finland) and was blown away by Sharon Jones's stage presence (she is the female James Brown) and the massive size of the step-synchronized Dap-Kings. Much of that energy and spunk translates directly into this record, which I always find myself spinning more often than I think I would.

25. Merriweather Post Pavilion: Animal Collective (2009)

This will forever be remembered as the album that launched Animal Collective into the stratosphere. The leap can be heard in the scope of the album, which feels expanded out towards space. It's not a pop album, but songs like "My Girls" and "Summertime Clothes" are as accessible as almost anything the band had recorded before. It's incredible that a band can evolve so greatly, so quickly yet still retain the essence of what makes it unique. On MPP, the band quell a bit of their campfire singalong rage, but remain creative, forward-looking, and engaging.

24. Relationship of Command: At the Drive-In (2000)
Once upon a time, I wanted nothing more out of music than a cheap adrenaline rush that occasionally would compel me to throw shoes and/or pieces of furniture around my room. While such qualities could be found in many albums, only a few also made me want to listen when I was in a calmer state of mind. Relationship of Command, the major label debut and swansong of At the Drive-In, fits such a bill. The record swirls and spins and forces itself into your ears, which I find fantastic. While I've enjoyed some Sparta and Mars Volta material this decade, I'd be much more pleased if they all dropped what they've been doing and got the old band back together again.

23. Gimme Fiction: Spoon (2005)
I could make the argument that Spoon has been the 'band of the decade.' All their albums have been incredibly solid and they have remained at the forefront of 'indie consciousness' from beginning to end. All this being said, I think Gimme Fiction is the best of the lot. All the best elements of the band are there: Britt Daniel's wispy white boy soul, dancing piano lines, towering and sinking melodies. The songs are all indefinably strong and passionate, from the punchiness of "The Beast and Dragon, Adored" to the pulsing and collapsing of "My Mathematical Mind." Gimme Fiction sounds, like very few albums this decade, like a hardworking, honest American band committed to perfecting its craft.

22. Circulatory System: Circulatory System (2001)
By the time I saw Circulatory System perform live, I was already a huge Olivia Tremor Control fan, but I hadn't heard much of Will Cullen Hart's post-OTC project. Their performance spun me around, blew my mind and prompted me to buy the band's self-titled debut after the show. Though in some ways more somber and spacey than the final OTC album Black Foliage, this record builds on that album in producing an expansive and muted psychedelic collage of sounds and words. Though most of the post-Elephant 6 world of this decade wasn't as exciting to me as the one that gave birth to it, I still found this album to keep the type of odd experimentation and melodic songcraft of the collective alive into this new century.

21. Speakerboxxx/The Love Below: OutKast (2003)
At the time, I probably concluded "Hey Ya!" would be the best song of the decade (and maybe it is), but there really are a lot of other amazing songs on this double album. It is frankly enormous--really two separate albums, one orchestrated by Andre 3000 and the other by Big Boi. They are both chock full of hits, hysterical interludes, head-scratching experimentation, and danceable beats with nods to just about any and every musical style imaginable. OutKast have always been able to mold their propensity for the bizarre into something accessible, and nowhere is that more evident than on this release.

20. Mclusky Do Dallas: Mclusky (2002)
This is one of the most hilariously vitriolic albums I've ever heard. It has the up-tempo catchiness of a Pixies record and an astute mix of over-the-top aggression and bouncing melody. The songs are all pretty short, loud, and quite possibly capable of ripping your face off. "To Hell With Good Intentions" is a prime example of what makes the album so great: it is lyrically ridiculous, it is hostile, it explodes and crashes with no regard for human life.

19. The Moon & Antarctica: Modest Mouse (2000)
The Moon & Antarctica is the perfect title for this album: it is dripping with darkness, cold, isolation. It's still the same old bending, discomforting Modest Mouse, but more subdued, looking up to the sky instead of to the west. The album is a bit of a rollercoaster, drifting from joy and exuberance to anger to deflation. Thematically, the songs are connected by outer space and reflections on troubling issues of life and death. The contrast and connection between consecutive songs like "Dark Center of the Universe" and "Perfect Disguise" are stunning and artfully done and are indicative of the mastery on this album of song placement and the utilization of all parts to form a complete whole.

18. We Are Beautiful, We Are Doomed: Los Campesinos! (2008)
I admit this album is short, and relatively recent, but with just their second release, Los Campesinos! were able to refine and perfect their unique sound. Everything is bouncy and jangly and pulling in a million different directions, with violins, xylophones, chimes, and keyboards ringing alongside the standard guitar, drums and bass. Lyrically, there are few bands who have been able to smartly capture the frustration of love lost and the spinning of dying youth as well as Los Campesinos!. "Ways to Make It Through the Wall" and "Documented Minor Emotional Breakdown #1" are explosive and comforting and get my blood pumping and feet tingling. I can't ask a lot more of my music than that.

17. Broom: Someone Still Loves You Boris Yeltsin (2005)
One of my first experiences with SSLYBY came via a YouTube video for the song "Pangaea," which features a tour of the band's neighborhood in Missouri through the eyes of a toy brontosaurus. I was immediately hooked by the modesty and seeming innocence of this band in its visual representation and sound. The album is simple and far from earthshattering, but it does contain extremely well-constructed indie pop songs that sound appropriate in almost any setting. There's a kind of hand-in-pockets, shrugged shoulders aesthetic about the band which I appreciate. "I Am Warm and Powerful" would certainly be in any top 10 list of songs I could make for this decade, as it perfectly captures the band's sound and focus on lazy youthful confusion.

16. Rated R: Queens of the Stone Age (2000)
I have never been able to adequately explain to anyone what 'stoner rock' really means. The few times I've used the phrase, I imagine people thought I was talking about 'jam' music a la Grateful Dead and their progeny. QOTSA are a far shout from that type of music, and just a few seconds of "Feel Good Hit of the Summer" should resolve any confusion. The music on Rated R is heavy, driving, and seems to come in and out of focus with every breath. While the band did benefit from Dave Grohl's adroit drumwork on their next album, Songs for the Deaf, I think this album better captures what I like about the band in terms of piecing together aggression, melody, and fuzz. The appearance by Mark Lanegan's vocals on "In the Fade" solidifies this album as complete and epic.

15. Transatlanticism: Death Cab for Cutie (2003)
An earlier version of myself would have likely been aghast that this band would be considered in my top 800 albums of the decade. I readily admit I used Death Cab as a whipping boy for wimpy, bland indie rock that seemed to be especially prevalent in the earlier parts of this decade. However, once I actually sat and listened, this album, along with We Have the Facts and We're Voting Yes, actually began to make sense to me. I started to see the beauty in restraint and the skill Ben Gibbard was able to employ in capturing mood and moment. The band owns the top two most-played songs on my iTunes and I am as likely to think of "The New Year" or "Expo '86" when I look back on the 'college years' as any two songs, as hard as that may be for me to admit.

14. Sonic Nurse: Sonic Youth (2004)
This actually is the only album from 2004 on the list, which is somewhat surprising. While I obviously really liked Murray Street, I found myself listening to this album a lot more over the course of the decade. It feels more like a complete Sonic Youth album than its predecessor, balancing Kim Gordon, Lee Ranaldo, and Thurston Moore numbers along with pop culture references and timely political commentary that I had come to appreciate in SY's repertoire. It is much more rough-around-the-edges and confident effort from the band than Murray Street. The album artwork is stunning and its songs solidified the fact that the band was able to create exciting material more than two decades after its inception.

13. Is This It: The Strokes (2001)
Perhaps this is unfair, but I think if The Strokes had been able to hold my attention beyond this album, Is This It would probably be rated much higher. Today, they have been in my eyes a one-trick pony. This album, however, does what a lot of people say it does in capturing the style and music of the times with great precision and ease. The songs are all laid back and cool, yet they are well-formed and enjoyable to listen to. They created a hype around the New York scene and injected a good deal of excitement about the potential of indie rock music in the new millennium. It is really difficult to imagine this decade without this album.

12. The Body, The Blood, The Machine: The Thermals (2006)
I really liked the first two albums from the Thermals, but it was not until this one came out that I realized they were what I would consider to be a 'great' band. Their songs grew in sophistication and complexity and the subject matter they tackled got deeper and more political. The songs really capture a lot of the confusion over the growing wave of religious fervor in the American political landscape during the decade. The album is aggressive, fast, full of religious imagery, and contains the penchant for melody and sing-along lyricism that I had appreciate in earlier Thermals works.

11. The Argument: Fugazi (2001)
Sometime in 2003 I think it was, I declared this to be, far and away, the best album of the decade thus far. While I've cooled on it a bit since then, I still believe it's an incredible album. It is, like most Fugazi releases, an ambitious foray into progressive hard rock with a decidedly social and political slant. The band still has a lot of important things to say and they are able to do so in an assertive and engaging manner. If this happens to be the last Fugazi album, it would be fitting since it fully captures the strength of the band in melding post-punk, angular guitar rock, and thought-provoking lyrics.

10. Oui: The Sea and Cake (2000)
This is an album and a band that I would have likely never come across if it weren't for my uncle. He recommended this record one day when I was in high school and there have been few stretches since that time that I haven't listened to it. For that age, it was not what I typically listened to: it was understated, it was calming, the vocals were delivered almost as a comforting whisper. It has always felt appropriate on a sunny, spring morning or on a lazy afternoon of lounging. It took me a long time to fully understand what was so great about it and how delicate music and nonsensical lyrics could be awe-inspiring works of art. Learning to like this album was akin to admitting that gentle breezes are better than strong winds.

9. Since I Left You: The Avalanches (2000)
I bought this album on a whim in high school and have never regretted that decision. This album is maddening, pieces falling from all directions to form some type of frightening collage of a night of dancing/staying home alone/counting hours in an insane asylum. It's incredible how well the album fits the confusion and inundation of sounds so prevalent in this decade, considering how it came out at its very beginning. Though many have tried, I haven't heard any recording since so effortlessly mash together disparate sources into a complete and captivating picture.

8. Kid A: Radiohead (2000)
Because it has been listed time and again as the 'album of the decade,' I almost didn't include it here. However, it's been impossible for me find a way to leave it off. Thinking back to when I first heard it, I remember believing I was listening to the most 'advanced,' boundary-pushing sounds out there. Granted, my knowledge of music back then was greatly limited, I still feel like it holds up after almost a decade as being a daring and stunning masterpiece. It was a departure in some ways from OK Computer, but it was also a great leap forward. The album is moody and internal and somehow encapsulates a lot of the uneasiness about modern life.

7. Microcastle: Deerhunter (2008)
I do not buy the argument that several years must pass before an album can be considered 'great.' I cannot say that I will feel the same way about this album in five years' time, but I do know that right now, it is one of the best records I've ever heard. It seamlessly melds the best of some of my favorite bands like the Beach Boys and My Bloody Valentine in its exploration into melody and noise. It is a record to me that sounds important, begs to be listened to repeatedly, yet it possesses a type of forlorn modesty. The emotional and sonic purging in songs like album closer "Twilight at Carbon Lake" are downright stunning. All in all, it's the record I was hoping I'd hear this decade even if I didn't realize it.

6. You Forgot It In People: Broken Social Scene (2002)
This album to me represents my idea of Canada (which makes sense, since about half that country's population has at some time been a member). It was odd how it came into my life--I acquired mp3s of the songs in a piecemeal fashion, eventually realizing that it formed a complete and near-flawless album. I would describe it as 'epic,' not only in its massive sound, but in the way that listening to it is like going on a journey rather than listening to a collection of 'really good' songs. Listening to this album whole is like having an experience. The guitar sound is gargantuan and deep. Though the songs appear to be extremely disparate in form and function at first blush, they all work together to create a spherical whole. You Forgot It In People would likely also get my vote for best album title this decade, and it somehow fits the record's content perfectly.

5. Agaetis Byrjun: Sigur Ros (2000)
I don't believe I have ever listened to this album while anyone else was around. I don't think I've ever played it in my car (which is where I like to listen to most music). Something about this record makes me want to be alone in my room (usually in the dark). It is unlike anything I've ever heard before, and I have an inadequate vocabulary to accurately describe it. There are no recognizable words (I don't speak Hopelandic), no catchy melodies, no propelling beats, yet it somehow possesses everything it needs. It is a dark, enigmatic mass in my mind that is always revealing something new and puzzling. It adeptly displays the how music can express what cannot be shown through words and images.

4. Veckatimest: Grizzly Bear (2009)
Though it was released only months ago, this album latched onto my ears and has not let go since. While Yellow House was good, this record builds upward from that album's understated elements to construct a fully-formed picture of place and time. The harmonies are gorgeous, the sounds expand and contract with incredible force, and the songs are complex without being overbearing. Listening to this album while winding through the fog in Bar Harbor, Maine this past summer somehow made it all make sense to me. There is something dark, yet calming about this album. It fully captures for me the end of the decade in terms of artistic pop expression and the height of indie music becoming mainstream in the album's impressive run on the Billboard charts.

3. Source Tags & Codes: ...And You Will Know Us By the Trail of Dead (2002)
In terms of complete spins on my stereo, this album would probably win for being played the most times this decade. I bought it at some music shop in Alexandria in high school and have had a hard time putting it down since. Every note, hiss, and yell on this album seems to be in the right place. It is difficult to meticulously and perfectly orchestrate 11 songs, yet make them feel and sound as if they were totally spontaneous and organic. Like in most of the albums near the top of this list, there is an incredible range of emotion and volume on this album. Several tracks grow from intense quiet to later explode into waves of crashes and booms. A great deal of this band's image has been tarnished by sub-par subsequent releases, but this album still to me seems to be breathing and living and haunting me, which is part of why I think it's so great.

2. White Blood Cells: The White Stripes (2001)
As one of the most 'important' indie rock albums of the last 10 years, White Blood Cells blew the roof off the 'rock revival' taking place at the beginning of the decade and took the White Stripes' popularity to new and unexpected heights. The album has an incredible balance, matching hard, bluesy rock numbers with equally compelling gentle ballads and country stomp. It also doesn't hurt to have one of the greatest album openers of all time in "Dead Leaves and the Dirty Ground" which, in a few short seconds, convinced me at the time that they were the greatest band in the world. This album, hearkening back to what I like best about 'rock music,' made this band an undying obsession for me for most of the first half of this decade.

1. Strawberry Jam: Animal Collective (2007)
It has all come down to this, down to peacebones and fireworks once again. I had been eagerly awaiting this album, having become obsessed with Feels and having seen the band play a few months before in Asheville. Strawberry Jam greatly exceeded my lofty expectations at the time and somehow still does. It incorporates everything I dig about Animal Collective--a kind of primal rage, bizarre bubbly sounds that require second and third listens to fully take in, as well as an incredible understanding of captivating melody. Some of the songs are terrifying and maddening, while others are more reflective and reserved. There is any incredible amount of depth and breadth for a 9-song, 43 minute album. In my hypothetical top-10 songs of the decade, "Fireworks" would be, far and away, number one. I really can't say a lot more about this album, but it definitely opened my eyes and defines to me what was great about music in this nameless decade.

GUEST: Zack's 50 Best Albums of the Decade

2009-12-31T09:16:00.000-05:00

1. Sept 10, 2007 Animal Collective - Strawberry Jam - It is a time-tested creed of my life that I originally hate the things I eventually come to hold in highest regard, and when the walls you've put up are finally shattered by the blistering light of truth, well, I'd like to think that's the feeling of being moved.
2. Sept 14, 2004 The Arcade Fire - Funeral - It seems to me that this album is as close as the last decade got to approaching the kind of mysteries that Neutral Milk Hotel explored, but more than that, it stands without peer as the most emotionally engaging musical expression of the decade.

3. Jul 1, 2003 Sufjan Stevens - Greetings from Michigan: The Great Lake State - Old-fashioned yet breathtakingly all-encompassing, this album showed the world Sufjan Stevens' weird and undeniable vignettes which paint stunning midwestern scenes with art-school brushes.
4. Oct 21, 2003 The Shins - Chutes too Narrow - On first listen I thought, this is the kind of band Superchunk wanted to mature into; several years later, I think James Mercer is the best pure pop songwriter of the new millennium.
5. Jul 3, 2006 TV on the Radio - Return to Cookie Mountain - What a weird band to get so popular, and what a driven, rhythmic section for a band composed of so many weird noises -- TV on the Radio sound like the future of music in the same way OK Computer did, and I can't think of a better compliment than that.
6. Oct 3, 2006 The Hold Steady - Boys and Girls in America - Sure, Craig Finn occasionally gets lost in histrionics and borderline misogyny, but his lexicon evokes hard-won wisdom in a way that's been missing in rock since Elliot Smith passed.
7. May 21, 2002 The Decemberists - Castaways and Cutouts - The Neutral Milk Hotel comparisons are fair, but one of the pitfalls of being reviewed by rock critics is being compared to previous bands, and, lord knows, there aren't very many better bands to be compared to.
8. Feb 7, 2006 Belle & Sebastian - The Life Pursuit - Not the complete reinvention some reviews made it out to be, The Life Pursuit is to 70s pop what If You're Feeling Sinister was to 60s folk, and if not quite as devastatingly affecting as their earlier masterpiece, it should certainly cement Belle & Sebastian as the best pop band of their kind, and makes a convincing case for their being one of the best bands of their time.
9. Jun 5, 2001 Radiohead - Amnesiac - I don't imagine history will ever be so kind as to vindicate my assertion that Amnesiac, although released second, is the more impressive album, but its weirdness runs deeper and seems more honest, less an observation of the technological overload of our decade, more of a beast staring out as us from within.
10. Apr 6, 2004 Of Montreal - Satanic Panic in the Attic - Kevin Barnes has gradually gone from a manic last outpost for the Elephant 6 collective's best moments to an insane person, and along the way has created several near-perfect albums, this being the best of them.
11. May 2, 2006 Sunset Rubdown - Shut Up I Am Dreaming - With so many manically fused musical ideas and observations about "things that have to die so that other things can stay alive", Spencer Krug seems poised to claim the indie rock throne his Northwestern mentor Isaac Brock once occupied.
12. Sep 26, 2000 The Microphones - The Glow, Pt. 2 - Humble without being twee, loud without ever rocking, confused and crystal clear, Phil Elvirum beautifully compresses not his influences, from the Beach Boys to Robert Pollard to the best of Elephant 6, into a postmodern gem that is rivaled by few.
13. Feb 21, 2006 Destroyer - Destroyer's Rubies - A rich, opulent listen full of dense intertextuality and expansively produced songs; if an album can be said to be Port-like, this would be the one.
14. Oct 15, 2002 Broken Social Scene - You Forgot It In People - A collective from Canada that pulls their disparate strands into a cohesive, unified whole to manage one of the most melodically compelling records of the decade.
15. Sept 13, 2005 Super Furry Animals - Love Kraft - If scoring were done based solely on the sheer number of ideas crammed into a sonic context, this album might take first prize, and since that's a big part of how I rate albums, this one scores pretty high.
16. Mar 16, 2004 Sufjan Stevens - Seven Swans - One thing I learned in college is that intensely intellectual people can have religious faith as well; likewise can one craft spiritual music without sounding like Switchfoot, and I can think of no more capable hands for the project than the prodigiously talented Sufjan Stevens
17. Aug 23, 2005 The New Pornographers - Twin Cinema - Twin Cinema explores the sheer force of the pop hook in all its glory, succeeding massively, and creating one of the most colorful, sunny records of the decade.
18. Jan 23, 2007 The Shins - Wincing the Night Away - Not by any means worse than the bands first two albums, but markedly more experimental, and if some immediacy is sacrificed for craft and surprise, both albums are unrepentant beacons in a tired indie-pop world.
19. Sep 9, 2003 British Sea Power - The Decline of British Sea Power - Miles beyond the Joy Division knockoffs they got lumped in with, British Sea Power are so much weirder, more musical, and energetic, that it's pointless to categorize them as post-punk revival instead of just one of the best bands of the decade.
20. Feb 19, 2008 Atlas Sound - Let The Blind Lead Those Who Can See But Cannot Feel - Bradford Cox may wind up being as prolific as anyone since Bob Pollard, with a range just as diverse, but he constructs his hooks in the architecture of experimentality, and with albums like this, he stands out as one of the most singular and evocative musical voices of the decade.
21. Sep 8, 2009 Yo La Tengo - Popular Songs - The first roll of pounding drums on opener "Here to Fall" will hook you immediately, and they're clearly banking on it because from there the band delves into progressively weirder echoes of their myriad stylistic diversions, breathtaking in sheer sweep.
22. Mar 22, 2005 The Decemberists - Picaresque - If the 2000s will be remembered as the decade where rock musicians turned their focus outward following the excess of the slobbering 90s, Colin Meloy is the decided admiral of the fleet, and if kitsch occasionally creeps into the arrangements, what part of American musical theater hasn't traditionally been affected with pomp and good-natured ostentation?
23. Apr 19, 2005 Caribou - The Milk of Human Kindness - If Radiohead's significant contribution to music is their passion play casting technology as the Romans, then Dan Snaith creates the sound of someone making friends with technology, making an ally of surprising warmth out of its metal coils.
24. Aug 20, 2002 Interpol - Turn on the Bright Lights - However history might remember this band, their debut album is a work of such poignant emotional depth and class that it should shine through the negativity associated with their over-hype.
25. Sep 9, 2003 My Morning Jacket - It Still Moves - That they seem so usual compared to the bulk of 2000s rock music, the bands' hollow-sounding take on rock'n'roll classicism is what sets them apart and makes them so much fun.
26. Feb 20, 2001 Spoon - Girls Can Tell - Spoon, from their inception have always been the indie band that weren't because they were too busy playing Pete Townsend-inspired riffs to care much about making a lot of noise or being really really aloof -- they've still got dad's clothes, and that's alright.
27. Feb 22, 2002 Yo La Tengo - And Then Nothing Turned Itself Inside-Out - The subtle, wraith-like tone poems that glide from this album are as beautiful as somnambulent atmospheric pieces, but carry a weight and affect to which songs this gentle have no right.
28. Jun 13, 2000 Modest Mouse - The Moon and Antarctica - Modest Mouse have calmed down considerably since their 1997 explosion of an album, and if they contemplate things with a more rational attitude, they spare none of the existential subject matter, and begin their transition into the band that essentially broke 2000s indie rock to the mainstream.
29. Feb 3, 2004 The Walkmen - Bows + Arows - Throughout their history The Walkmen have been occasionally boring, sloppy, and borderline self-parodic, but this album is a near-perfect distillation of all they stand for musically and probably some profundities they didn't intend.
30. Jul 13, 2004 The Fiery Furnaces - Blueberry Boat - Overflowing with creative energy, this bother-sister duo are staggeringly inventive throughout the thirteen tracks of this album.
31. Mar 9, 2004 Destroyer - Your Blues - The most flamboyant component of the divisive Your Blues is also its best, cheeseball synths and all, and there's no shame in that because theatricality is the arena in which Destroyer thrives.
32. Jul 5, 2005 Sufjan Stevens - Illinoise - Swiftly, Stevens penned three of the greatest albums of the decade, and if this one loses points it's only for being a bit long in the tooth here and there.

33. Jul 3, 2001 The White Stripes - White Blood Cells - The most exciting, in the moment album this duo has cut features a mold of their simplistic sound with first-rate songwriting, for a rewarding, consistent listen.
34. Oct 7, 2003 The Books - The Lemon of Pink - The Schoenberg of experimental music, The Books compose music out of acoustic guitars, samples, digital cut-and-pasting, and probably a good amount of theory that they don't much explain, and while that sounds, on paper, like it could put you to sleep, this is music that needs to be marveled at, not overanalyzed.
35. May 22, 2001 Whiskeytown - Pneumonia - Before Wilco, Whiskeytown released this gem of genre-hopping pop songs to bust out of their alt-country designation, and while Ryan Adams never produced the perfect album everyone was routing for, Pneumonia is as close as he could reasonable be expected to get.
36. Jun 23, 2009 Dinosaur Jr. - Farm - In case anyone was wondering what separated the original lineup of Dinosaur Jr. from J's rotating cast of musicians through the 90s, it's that Lou Barlow and Murph are one of the great rhythm sections of all time, and here the band sounds heavier and more confident than ever.
37. May 23, 2006 Mission of Burma - The Obliterati - If there's one thing the 2000s have proven it's that guys pushing fifty can rock as hard as they did twenty years prior; now Mission of Burma have proven that even tinnitus is no longer an excuse, and I heard that in response, dads around the world are picking up guitars, hoping to become the next Roger Miller.
38. Sep 25, 2007 Iron & Wine - The Shepherd's Dog - Sam Beem brightens his originally homogenized sound with inventive arrangements and grows in a musically satisfying way.
39. Jul 10, 2007 Spoon - Ga Ga Ga Ga Ga - When the 1990s wanted to call them the next Pixies, Spoon reacted with by producing albums with such consistency and anglophilism throughout the 2000s that they sound downright classicist, influenced by the Clash and Billy Joel more than post-punk and this album shows them in fine form, crafting some of the best uptempo ballads of their career.
40. May 24, 2005 Stephen Malkmus - Face the Truth - If at points on this album Malkmus sounds genuinely unhinged, its probably because Face the Truth marks the first time in his career that he's making music so screwy even he can't seem to wrap his considerable intellect around it.

41. Jun 4, 2002 Deerhoof - Reveille - There is an undefined genre characterized by noisy, rhythmically haphazard groups fronted by Asian girls singing nonsense, and amongst such groups Deerhoof surely stand as the most impressive example.
42. Feb 11, 2003 Stars - Heart - I'm sick of pretending there isn't a respository of cheesy romanticism in me (I think, somewhere in the left ventricle), and this album satisfies that gushy impulse with the best of 'em.
43. Aug 19, 2003 Guided by Voices - Earthquake Glue - Robert Pollard is the most obvious genius in rock music but refuses to let anyone see it for a whole album; if there was ever an artist who needed to be considered for the sun-like brilliance of his entire catalog, it is Pollard, but as far as individual albums go, Earthquake Glue is his best in this millennium.
44. May 23, 2006 Phoenix - It's Never Been Like That - Few people would proudly bear the moniker "soft rock" and fewer still could make it a compelling listen; that Phoenix succeed makes this album one of the most impressive in mainstream music.
45. Sep 18, 2007 Les Savy Fav - Let's Stay Friends - Always full of surprises, Les Savy Fav here go for a set of more thought-out songs, wedding their characteristic surprises into the kinds of songs most bands would deal with the devil to write.
46. Sep 11, 2001 Beulah - The Coast is Never Clear - People thought this album a bit of a letdown when it first came out, but that was in 2001 when everybody was waiting for the next Pavement; instead, The Coast is Never Clear is an actually sunny album with some wry twists that make it an indie pop classic.
47. May 4, 2004 The Reigning Sound - Too Much Guitar - Easily the album least likely to on this list, but their conflation of noise-rock and garage revivalism is too hot to pass over.
48. Apr 23, 2003 Wilco - Yankee Hotel Foxtrot - As with all the music I've come to adore, I had a hell of a time getting into Yankee Hotel Foxtrot, mainly just going along with my firends' opinions because I assumed there was something there I wasn't seeing; my thoughts now are that the album isn't showy or dynamic or the life-changing event some have insisted it should be, but it is graceful, complete, and assiduous, and marked by a subtle but self-assured poetry that won't ever blow your mind, but will give you pause now and then.
49. Feb 6, 2007 Deerhunter - Cryptograms - The real shocker isn't that nobody criticized this band for ripping off The Fall, but that these perversely damaged songs are engaging in their active efforts at alienation and cries out for affection.
Sep 11, 2001 The Moldy Peaches - The Moldy Peaches - I know this album pretty much blows, but I had to give the cabosse award to someone, and I can think of no band who would like that better or would have done more to earn it.

GUEST: Chris's Top 15 Albums of the Decade

2009-12-22T09:57:00.000-05:00

Hello internet, hi hello konnichiwa. So Carrington asked me to do this best albums of the 00s list under the assumption that I have good taste in music, and I’m kind of worried that it may not reflect such an assumption in practice. It’s going to include the stuff I liked the most over the course of the decade, weighed on some subjective sliding scale balancing how much I liked it at the time and how much I like it now. Also, before you start reading, you should know that this list will not contain any Radiohead. I just never got into Radiohead. Sorry.

Oh, and I hope this doesn’t look too much like the Pitchfork list.

Alright, let’s get into it:

15) Silversun Pickups – Carnavas

Usually I care a lot about a rock band’s lyrics. After a few listens I can sing along with most of the album. Not so much at times with Silversun Pickups, maybe because they don’t always make a lot of sense, but it’s actually not a problem at all. They get the atmospheric rock thing down very well, and the basslines and hooks are tight enough to just groove along with even without the vocals. And I actually think it’s pretty clever when they do the minute-long outro in “Dream at Tempo 119” only to burst back in with another verse beginning with “I couldn’t end it there.” I need a little more time to really evaluate this one, I think, but it’s definitely quite a solid rock album if you’re into that kind of thing.

14) The Blood Brothers – Burn, Piano Island, Burn

In all honesty, I would probably hate these guys if I hadn’t seen them live before hearing the record. Whatever freaky nightmare world Piano Island is located in is probably home to a lot of the kids that shop at Hot Topic, and the back-and-forth vocals kind of sound like all those Hot Topic kids screeching in unison. But it’s somehow really catchy. I don’t know what the word for it is. Raw, maybe? Yeah, let’s go with raw. They also have a song that I’m fairly certain is loosely based on one of my favorite short stories (“The Salesman Denver Max,” based on Joyce Carol Oates’s “Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been?”), so props for that.

13) Minus The Bear – Highly Refined Pirates

Minus The Bear’s kind of a one-trick pony, but that’s not such a bad thing if it’s a good trick. Guitarist Dave Knudsen’s two-hand tapping guitar technique really drives the band, and I think his skills are best displayed on Highly Refined Pirates, an album about racing yachts and bumming around in Paris and various other key elements of living the good life. They’re not popular in many circles for basically coming off as a bunch of frat douches, which might not be too far from the truth, but what can I say? I dig the aesthetic they’re workin’ on.

12) Junior Senior – Hey Hey My My Yo Yo

So a skinny straight guy and a fat gay guy walk into a bar in Denmark. Then a funk band comes from somewhere and they all ROCK YOUR DAMN FACE OFF. Yeah, look, I know it’s not smart music or anything with lines like “Hello darlin’/pardon my French/we been lookin for a guy with a monkey wrench/Talkin’ trash/into a can/onto a record/and then you can dance.” But sometimes you just gotta dance, right?

11) Jens Lekman – Night Falls Over Kortedala

I wonder what they put in the water in Scandinavia to make everyone so happy despite the gross weather. There’s a weird unbridled joy in most of Jens Lekman’s music, replete with sweeping harps and jazzy basslines and goofy barbershop quartet backup vocals, even when he’s singing ostensibly sad songs like “I’m Leaving You Because I Don’t Love You” and “If I Could Cry (It Would Feel Like This).” Dude carries a certain naiveté about him that’s kind of disarming and pretty great to listen to. Can’t wait to see what the Swedish boy wonder does next.

10) Junior Boys – Last Exit

I actually feel pretty weird about putting this so high on the list, but it really is an amazing album. It’s atmospheric without being boring, occasionally danceable, and always has a mysterious and sort of ethereal quality to it. It’s perfect night driving music. My favorite electronic album of the past 10 years for sure. Why didn’t these guys get in the UPS commercials instead of the Postal Service? Don’t you realize you’re just giving publicity to the competition???

9) Ted Leo and the Pharmacists – The Tyranny of Distance

Ted Leo is pretty much what every musician should try to be, I think. Consistently excellent live shows, pretty frequent album releases, and on top of his game when it comes to the issues. Dude’s a consummate professional. And he did a Halloween show as Glenn Danzig, playing only Misfits/Danzig songs and not breaking character the entire time. Seriously, how do you not love that? Anyway, it’s hard to pick a favorite between this and Hearts of Oak for this spot, but I have to give Tyranny the edge because I think the guitar work is just a little more interesting. One of the few legit guitar masters in indie rock, that Ted Leo.

On a semi-related note, there’s something that’s always bugged me about the Pitchfork review of the Ted Leo album Shake the Sheets, which did not make this list. The reviewer says, “You find yourself strangely aggravated by Leo's characteristic punk-scat; especially unforgivable is a Jacko-like "shebooyah" in "Walking to Do". Aoyama and Shibuya are places in Japan and I’m 98% certain that is what Ted Leo is talking about in this particular song. EARN YOURSELF SOME GEOGRAPHY, PFM.

8) Cursive - Domestica

Screeching, discordant guitars and much wailing and gnashing of teeth about a relationship that apparently involved a lot of screeching, discord, wailing, and gnashing of teeth. David Byrne once said that the worse someone sings, the easier it is to believe what they’re saying, so it’s pretty easy to take Tim Kasher seriously on this album as he’s tears apart the power dynamics and other foundations of, well, everyone’s relationships, I guess. I sometimes feel a little ripped off by albums that are only 9 tracks long, but I think it works here. Spending any more time with Sweetie and Pretty Baby would be too much. Maybe that’s where they went wrong in the first place.

Fun story, Kasher was incredibly drunk while performing one particular Cat’s Cradle show and referred to The Blood Brothers (the openers that night) as “The Blood Buddies.” This is still hilarious to me.

7) Coheed and Cambria – Good Apollo, I’m Burning Star IV

Alright, so maybe this is a little shameful, but just shut up about it okay? I just really dig any band who will shamelessly bust out riffs that sound completely stolen from Rush or Iron Maiden, and Coheed delivers these in spades! I think this is probably my favorite album of theirs because Claudio Sanchez finally learned to stop sounding like a girl at all times and the big Willing Well series at the end is a pretty epic little chunk of proggy goodness culminating in some kind of bizarre steel guitar-fueled hoedown. I could really give a shit about the associated sci-fi comic books and all that, I’m just in it for the movie trailer-approved catchy faux-metal riff bonanza. And if that’s not good enough for you well you can just KISS MY GRITS, SALLY.

6) The Wrens – The Meadowlands

When you have that first big high school/college breakup, this is the kind of album you need to have on hand to help you wallow in your misery. In that respect, I guess it’s kind of like a modern-day Pet Sounds, except with fewer harmonies. Aside from the couple songs about touring with your band, the whole album is just a big parade of misery and bitterness that somehow never becomes overbearing. Additionally 13 Months in 6 Minutes may be the saddest song ever written. There’s so much helplessness and despair and disappointment contained in that song that it’s really just impossible for me not to listen to it multiple times, secretly hoping that our narrator hero will figure something out the second time through. About a minute from the end, there’s a big crescendo that changes the whole mood of the song, and it’s just enough to give you a little hope that he’s sprinting to the airport to stop his dream girl from getting on the plane after saying goodbye for what he knows will be the last time. He never does, but you get the sense he’s come to terms with it. Yeah, maybe it’s not romantic, but it’s real at least.

5) Andre Nickatina – Conversation with a Devil

This is my favorite hip hop album of all time. Almost certainly not the best, but my favorite. In case you are not familiar with Mr. Nickatina, well, don’t feel too bad because I still am not either. He’s a San Francisco Bay Area rapper who makes a ton of records and a lot of them aren’t all that well-made. He might be big in San Francisco, but I’m not even clear on that. But Conversation with a Devil, man… there’s just something about it. It’s like rooting for the ragtag group of misfits in Mighty Ducks or something.

The album is apparently the soundtrack to a movie he made that’s kind of a Scarface knockoff, and it kinda follows the general plot of: guy sells a lot of drugs and has a pretty sweet time doing it, gets set up by his friend and goes to jail, does some time and gets out of the drug game. It seems to me the album conveys the point better than the movie would, though. Andre Nickatina doesn’t really have a powerful rap voice, but somehow it fits with his lyrical style, which is somehow braggadocios but still down to earth. The beats are unusually melodic, perfectly produced, and have instrumentation ranging from minimal, fuzzy bass to acoustic guitar arpeggios to bagpipes. It’s unlike any hip hop record I’ve heard before or since. And by the end of the record, you feel like you know this guy—just an everyday dude telling his story. I mean, look at that album art. You think Jay-Z would even put that on one of his mixtapes?

4) Jon Brion – Meaningless

Jon Brion is mostly known for being a producer and for scoring Charlie Kaufman films and I Heart Huckabees these days, but this is about as close to a perfect pop album as you’re gonna find. It’s funny, catchy, and has a little bit of that ol’ emotional resonance to boot. “Walking Through Walls” also has the absolute most cheerful way to say “motherfucker” in recent memory. I that contend you could play it on the radio – who could be offended? Some PopMatters reviewer named David Medsker called this the Album of the Decade back when it came out in 2001. Turns out he might be right.

3) The Mountain Goats – We Shall All Be Healed

I’m one of those people who always liked John Darnielle better with a band and decent production value instead of a 4-track recorder droning away in the background. If you are also one of these people, this is the album for you! Cotton and Palmcorder Yajna are two of my all-time favorite lyrical songs, but there really isn’t a weak one on the whole album. It’s kind of weird to see The Mountain Goats live and watch John cheerfully recount his days as a junkie in his Mitch-Hedberg-on-Ecstacy banter style before playing any of these songs, but I think that’s part of the charm of it maybe. The guy can make you smile as he’s making you feel about the stickpins in the cotton that he left in the top drawer. Poor little fellers.

BONUS FUN FACT: I once tried to write a short story based on the song Against Pollution, about a liquor store clerk who shoots a would-be robber in the face, but eventually decided against it because I felt like I didn’t know enough about liquor stores or shooting people in the face.

2) The Avalanches – Since I Left You
There are some albums that you should really only listen to straight through, and I think this TOE-TAPPIN’, HEAD BOBBIN’ CLASSIC is one of them. I have a hard time separating the tracks from one another in my head (aside from Frontier Psychiatrist, which is really a monster unto itself), and I think that’s the real strength of The Avalanches – so many little disparate parts combine to form a thing so cohesive you can’t even tell where one track ends and another begins. If you’ve never heard their Australian Breezeblock mixes, do yourself a favor and check those out—it’s the best we have until they decide to put out another proper album.

1) Modest Mouse – The Moon & Antarctica

My freshman and sophomore years of high school, I was really into pop punk. The Ataris, The Vandals, all that stuff. I forgot where I actually heard of Modest Mouse in the first place, but this album was the catalyst for my interest in the broader “indie rock” genre and is really responsible for a lot of my musical taste from 2001 onward. So like, 95% of the rest of the stuff on this list. When all you’ve been exposed to musically is Jimmy Buffett, Kenny Loggins, and the Warped Tour crowd, a song like The Stars Are Projectors is pretty mindblowing. Nearly ten years later, and it’s still just as good. Which is to say, really, really, really good.

It's the End of the World as We Know It (...or is it?)

2009-12-21T15:18:00.001-05:00

It’s odd to have spent nearly 10 years within the confines of a ‘decade’ and still not know what to call it. The ‘aughts,’ the ‘naughties,’ the ‘2000s,’ et cetera have all proven to be ill-fitting monikers for a period that has kicked off a new century and a new millennium. It’s strange that no nickname has caught on considering how modern media outlets have become so adept at naming things that within hours a label can become wholly inextricable from the original event (see ‘Balloon Boy’). Perhaps we are just living in completely indefinable times. Well, whatever you want to call January 1, 2000 to December 31, 2009, one thing I know for sure is that it is almost over. While this period has provided some majorly negative events (September 11, 2001, the Iraq War, Hurricane Katrina, the recession, etc.), it hasn’t been all bad. All told, it’s been a pretty interesting time to have gone through high school, college, and the beginnings of my post-graduate life, thanks in large part to the internet explosion (not sure how the universe could have existed before Wikipedia, YouTube, Facebook, College Humor, et al.)

Seeing as the change from 2k9 to 2k10 will be sort of a momentous occasion, it seems to be an appropriate time to quantify and qualify some of what happened in these last 10 years. I figure there is no better way to make sense of it all than to do countdowns of some of things that helped define the decade. (The Rolling Stones and Pitchforks of the world should not have a monopoly on the list-making business, after all). Starting later today (hopefully), and intermittently thereafter, I will post lists about this decade’s best music and (ideally) other things from friends and myself. At this time of year when everything seems to be moving at a dizzying pace, it’s important to slow down and reflect for a minute about what has been going on while you’ve been busy updating your Facebook status. So, please enjoy.

holidaze (premature)

2009-11-15T20:59:00.001-05:00

in case you haven't noticed, the 'holiday season' is upon us (at least according to wal-mart commercials, store displays, etc). though it has become somewhat needlessly protracted, i do really like this time of year. for this reason, i have been having an ongoing debate on the merits of various holidays.

one of my favorite websites, the online etymology dictionary, notes that the term 'holiday' quite obviously came from the old english words for 'holy' and 'day.' by the 14th century it meant both a 'religious festival' and 'day of recreation,' but its meaning had diverged even further from its origins by the 16th century.

today, i'm not exactly sure what 'holiday' really means. a day off work? a day to be with family? a day to 'get crunk'? there is a day for seemingly everything at this point, which begs the question, can every day really be a holiday? part of what i like about major holidays is that they are infrequent and break up the normal routine in some way, so i'm not so convinced.

some days, purportedly 'legit' holidays, are puzzling to me; rubber duckie day (january 13), middle name pride day (march 12), and national two different colored shoes day (may 3) all sound pretty awesome, but i don't really know much about what or why i would be celebrating. i mean, just this week, we will have to cram in homemade bread day (november 17), married to a scorpio day (not applicable, but november 18), and world toilet day (wtf, november 19). too much for me to handle right now. (btw, this website is a good source of random holidays if you are interested).

in spite of this confusion, i decided to make a list of my 10 favorite holidays of all time. a forewarning: these choices have obviously been influenced by my american and christian upbringing, so your favorite holiday may not be listed. apologies.

10. valentine's day: i literally like this day only because there is an off chance i will eat candy from a heart-shaped box/receive a card from my mother with $20 inside.

9. st. patrick's day: i haven't done much in the way of celebrating this day, but i like ireland and i like the color green. i also find the concept of putting food coloring in beer to be very intriguing.

8. groundhog day: who doesn't love a large, sagacious rodent who provides weather forecasts?

7. memorial day: the unofficial start of summer pretty much unfailingly equates to seashores, sunshine, and relaxation, and with those elements, i can take no issue.

6. easter: we still have easter egg hunts every year, and the easter bunny still leaves reese's cups, a yo-yo, and the occasional new pair of flip flops in my yellow easter basket. so that's good. this holiday also gets points for signaling the start of spring.

5. 4th of july/my birthday: not really the same day, but close enough for this list. this day was pretty lame to me when i was younger because everyone was out of town, meaning i had to throw bday parties in may or june (once in april), but now i realize it is pretty chill to combine national holiday/birthday celebrations if you plan correctly. as a lover of both fireworks and attention, i find the beginning of july to be particularly exciting.

4. thanksgiving: i like the way peoples' homes smell at thanksgiving, namely of delicious food being cooked. i also like any day that includes the opportunity to over-eat comforting food, watch football, nap, then over-eat leftovers.

3. new years: usually debaucherous, occasionally celebrated in interesting locales, always a good time. there's a great deal of anticipation and it's a nice time to get together with old friends. and as may be apparent already, i like counting backwards from 10.

2. halloween: this holiday has changed a great deal from my 'dressing-as-batman-and-knocking-on-neighbors'-doors-and-hoping-to-get-a-regular-sized-(and-not-fun-sized)-snicker-bar' days, but it's still a great excuse to dress up, hang with friends, decorate a house in cobwebs, and dance to 'thriller.'

1. christmas: kind of an obvious choice, i know. much different than any other holiday, christmas for my family is reduced to a clockwork ritual from about 3:00 pm christmas eve until 11:00 pm christmas day, and i wouldn't change any of it. great food (holla at a chick-fil-a party tray), great drinks (brandy alexanders), great company (lots of cousins), and tons of decorations up in the house. plus there's 'a christmas story' on tv, the smell of a live tree in my living room, and of course, presents. in spite of having 'a kenny g christmas' playing on repeat from sun up to sun down, it really is the best day of the year.

2009 troika festival, or a lengthy explanation of why i was in downtown durham

2009-11-09T11:03:00.002-05:00

from an early age, i was fascinated and puzzled by the concept of place. i really liked looking at maps and finding out what tibet and iceland looked like in my world book encyclopedias (pre-wikipedia source of random information). when i finally started to travel myself, i was constantly trying to evaluate what made maine or france different from my backward corner of eastern north carolina.

place was not something I readily related to music, though, until sometime later. i likely connected bluegrass-type music with my own state, but it took me a while to wrap my head around the idea of a ‘scene’ defining a location musically. as someone who grew up in the shadow of the 1990s, seattle comes to mind as an example of a ‘scene’ that spawned bands that had a ‘sound,’ but this concept has likely been around as long as music itself. one can imagine how cavemen in one area influenced each other to clap rocks together in similar ways so that each tribe was its own ‘scene’ with a unique ‘sound’ of prehistoric ‘rock’…

i really grew to appreciate north carolina music when i got into ben folds five, and then superchunk, archers of loaf, and polvo. since then, i’ve realized what a fertile ground this state has been for all kinds of music—especially in the triangle. the sound can range from gentle folk to hip hop that makes me want to take my shirt off and twist it round my head like a helicopter, which is pretty cool.

with all this in mind, i stepped into the chilly november air at durham central park (really a covered space near downtown used as the farmers market) to see the start of the 2009 troika festival, a three-night music showcase of mostly local bands at venues all over durham.

the first act to perform on the outdoor stage was the beast, a group who quite capably meld hip hop, jazz, and apparently latin sounds. i must say, I missed most of their set, but i did hear the song featured on the recent “hear here” compilation, “my people,” and a song about going to puerto rico in which the gathered audience was asked to sing in spanish (i declined the invitation). the group had a captivating energy and they seem worthy of being checked out, especially considering the awesome rhyme i picked out of one song that involved r.l. stine and goosebumps.

after the beast finished, the crowd moved in closer to the stage to hear the grizzled harmonies of megafaun. i have trouble describing their sound adequately; they are kind of folky, kind of 70s throwback rock, very much americana (whatever that means). the band are extremely entertaining live—they provided witty banter about borrowed amps, the city of rochester, minnesota, the kansas city chiefs, and they were very gracious and very supportive of the local music scene. their set included “lazy suicide” and “the fade,” two excellent cuts, alongside some other hand-clappin’ jaunty numbers. audience participation was again encouraged, and this time i obliged the request. as i stood there clapping my fingerless target gloves and providing off-key vocals under my breath, i felt a sort of swelling of pride (or was it the chicken wings i had just eaten?) for the triangle music scene. it is so very much unlike what i imagine the magical, musical land of brooklyn is like when i close my eyes at night. and then, at that moment, i realized that was a very good thing.

after megafaun closed out with everyone in attendance belting out in unison, my friend and I made the short trek through the bull city to the durham performing arts center (the absurdly dubbed ‘D-PAC’). it is a fancy, new facility with a column of light out front that shoots straight up into outer space. we flashed our orange arm bands and passed through a blood red tunnel into one of the nicest theater spaces i’ve seen. it was quite massive. the set-up of this show was pretty strange: the bands were “backstage,” more or less to the side of the stage, and the audience stood on the stage facing them. they had a couple bars and a merch table set up there too. there was a decent-sized crowd there, but not nearly as large as i had expected.

the first band we saw, which we unfortunately missed most of, was humble tripe. i had not heard of them beforehand, but i definitely want to learn more. the last song they performed was especially impressive. the singer/guitarist has some gnarly pipes, which grew in force as the song progressed. my friend compared it to a neutral milk hotel song, which was fitting considering the presence of a trumpet and a pretty gut-wrenching vocal delivery. but yeah, that’s pretty much all i gathered.

next were the future kings of nowhere, about whom i had heard a lot, but had never seen live. they are a well-oiled machine. the music is pretty jumpy and driven by the acoustic guitar of the lead singer. i really liked the way he intonated his voice, highlighting the self-referential and often humorous lyrics. they reminded me at times of bright eyes or tom waits. overall, the FKON were an entertaining lot, a solid, confident band i wouldn’t mind seeing again.

the headliners for the evening were bowerbirds, who apparently have just arrived back in the states from europe. the first thing i noticed was that the singer’s voice was amazing; then I realized everyone in the band could also sing. like megafaun, they seem to function best when harmonizing the pants off a song. their music is very delicate, very listenable, and very musically engaging. the accordion, occasional organ, and violin add a great depth to their sound. all this being said, the mood in most of their songs is so similar and the melodies are so slight, that after a while, i felt like things were dragging a bit. don’t get me wrong, what I was hearing was beautiful; excellent harmonies and very poignant lyrics, mostly dealing with nature. but aside from standouts “in our talons” and “northern lights,” the songs are neither particularly catchy nor memorable. however, i don’t think the band’s primary goal is to create foot stomping excitement, so ill take it as it is.

night two of troika brought me to the trotter building on foster street. i have no idea what this building is normally used for, but it had ads for yoga lessons, nice big windows with a view of downtown, and a decent-sized open floor space, though not the best acoustics, which was really okay since the subtleties of sound were not really as vital to the bands on night two as the previous one.

the huguenots played first. i’ve seen them once before and i think they’re an enjoyable band. they all wear ties and seem to be really into what they’re doing, which always helps. they remind me of an early 1960s band, expect a bit louder and more rocking. it was a late-arriving crowd, so unfortunately, most folks missed them.

brett harris followed, accompanied by four other guys. the sound was very MOR, poppy, just the right amount of volume. i don’t recall a great deal else, though i remember thinking they’d be a fantastic band to have at a party.

the band i really came to see was the legendary hammer no more the fingers. they easily had the largest following, which included fans that sang single every word out loud and clapped at exactly the right moments. to me, all the HNMTF material is really fantastic, especially tunes like “the visitor,” “shutterbug,” and “radiation.” they are an exciting band live, mixing emotive shouts with memorable guitar riffs and compelling melodies. they craft really strong, bouncy tunes that you can sing along to, nod your head, and even pump your fist every once in a while—pretty much all i ask of a rock band.

the next band was actually from atlanta, so i don’t know if i should say much about them. gentleman jesse and his men play a type of rock that is reminiscent of that band from the movie “that thing you do,” but a bit more ragged around the edges. they had a ton of energy and put on a good show.

i have to admit i was too tired to stick around for the last act (which is acceptable if you are in your mid-twenties, i think). but I felt I had gotten my money’s worth anyway. overall, the 9 acts I saw at the festival were all pretty amazing—some extremely talented musicians all doing really interesting, creative stuff. there isn’t an act i saw that i wouldn’t see again.

despite the fact that the triangle is a pretty large metropolitan area—one of the fastest growing in the country—there is something about it that is much less urban than a lot of the places similar to it in population numbers. that characteristic comes through in the music, which often appears fixated on the pastoral, on the banjo, on good honest rock music, and on the small-town community feeling of having grandma, a 3-year-old, and a college hipster all clapping hands to the same song. whether or not anyone else in the music world cares, the triangle has some great bands making exciting music. so i guess if everyone has to be from some place, i’m definitely fine calling the triangle home.

young hearts spark fire

2009-10-20T23:17:00.003-04:00

what are sundays good for? other than sleeping in, lazing around the house and nursing self-inflicted wounds from the night before, it’s hard to say. my sundays never get started before they wilt again into a type of eerie stillness that doesn't seem to exist on other nights. i guess the world is just hiding and waiting for another week to jump out from behind a bush and pummel them.

it was 9:47 p.m. before i realized other people may actually show up to see real estate and japandroids at local 506 this past sunday night. folks cautiously trickled in out of the foreign cold and stood wingspans apart in the uneasy dark. no one really said anything. i sat by the wall, swirling my beer, obsessively checking my phone for new text messages. when real estate finally took the stage, the slight crowd that had gathered inched forward but stopped about 10 feet from the band. everyone is wary on sundays.

from the first note, real estate were (and this is not gushing) everything i'd hoped they'd be. i'd been collecting their splashy tunes dispersed across the internet since the beginning of the year, but i really didn't have any frame of reference on them, except that they were from new jersey and were seemingly fixated on the seaside. the good thing about seeing bands who haven't been around the block for years and years is that when you see them live, you are pretty certain to hear the vast majority of their canon. real estate, graciously, played among others, 'green river,' 'suburban beverage,' 'fake blues,' and 'beach comber' (which may or may not be my favorite song of this year). every song resolved itself like i remembered, but they all (unsurprisingly) felt heavier and more expansive live.

though much has been made of real estate and their ‘beach aesthetic,’ the more i thought about it that night, the more i realized they reminded me of something more complicated-- i didn’t see myself sitting out by the water, skin burning from the sun, feet burning from the sand. the music feels more like the act of looking at faded pictures of yourself at the beach when you were younger—questionable swimwear fashion, sandbuckets, ambivalent smiles drawn out from summer living. these kinds of pictures may be more perfect than reality, but they feel depressing because they are either not entirely true or too distant to be verified. with all this in mind, i realized real estate seem to be a better winter band than summer one—they make the music of grasping toward lost warmth. it is the fleeting feeling of heat and glistening sunlight on water somewhere back in your head and not in front of your eyes that i get from their shimmery guitars and wistful vocals. it is a louder dreamlike version of false memories of sand and surf conveyed through a sound that's distinct and hauntingly familiar. perhaps i need to visit atlantic city.

on that cold night, likely the coolest we’ve had in central north carolina in the second half of 2009, another band (that somehow also reminds me of warmth) took the stage and rocked out to exact extent necessary for a late sunday evening. japandroids are from vancouver and mostly play loud, energetic songs about girls and love and stuff like that. this band’s songs remind me of spring rather than summer, how you get that nervous bouncy glow inside about the sun and the flowers coming back after a long, cold winter. japandroids (there are but two of them) pack the stage with various shapes and sizes of amps, a drum kit, and a fan (which is a good idea since the guitarist, brian, thrashes about a lot while he plays). the songs are built on propulsion, reverb, and some nice drum work, but they all have just enough melody to keep you interested and wanting to sing (shout) along. unfortunately, the set was a little short, likely on account of the fact that brian started losing his voice midway through. nevertheless, they played all the hits-- 'heart sweats,' 'the boys are leaving town,' 'young hearts spark fire,' etc. towards the end, a few people actually began to nod their heads a little. then it was over. i threw my empty high life into the bin and made my way back to a deader than dead franklin street.

there is probably no help for sundays. monday will always be there staring over your shoulder, gnashing its teeth. the world will still be huddled inside watching football or counting down the hours until work starts again. i guess in spite of that, it’s good to venture out and try to put your mind somewhere else (idealized forms of the beach, memories of springtime butterflies, etc.), if only for a little while.

real estate: www.myspace.com/letsrockthebeach (their self-titled LP is set to come out november 17, so you should definitely try to pick it up)

japandroids: http://www.myspace.com/japandroids (their first LP ‘post-nothing’ came out a couple months ago, so get it)

Goodbye, 2008--Some Albums Containing Music

2008-12-18T15:32:00.028-05:00

I thought 2008 was a pretty decent year, as far as years go. The music wasn't all that bad either, so I've decided to resurrect the blog for the sole purpose of listing items backwards in a largely arbitrary fashion, cause that's what I do best. So, included below are my choices for the greatest albums of all time* in my humble, shortsighted, sheltered opinion. (Advance apologies to Fleet Foxes who will forever be associated to a near-fatal sunburn and monumental hangover and accordingly will not be discussed further.)

* List limited to albums released in the year 2008

10. Times New Viking- Rip It Off
Columbus's TNV got me quite excited about the year in music when they released Rip It Off early in '08. The album is noisy and, at least for me, can't be listened to at my normal volume because of a lingering buzz in my ear. That is part of the charm. What makes this album great is that in spite of any aural discomfort, it is ridiculously addicting and compelling. The songs are short and catchy, obscured behind a blanket of itchy wool. I was lucky enough to see the band live this fall--they were no less noisy, but even more charming in person. I became re-addicted to this album upon seeing them and probably will remain so, at least until something bad happens, like if my ears start bleeding. The songs "Teen Drama" and "Relevant: Now" are really quite exceptional.

9. Stephen Malkmus + Jicks- Real Emotional Trash

This summer, out in the desert that is central Washington, I thought I saw god. And he wasn't wearing a toga, nor did he have a big white beard; he was a lanky, shaggy-haired white guy with a red sweater wielding a guitar (no lightning bolts). In all seriousness, Stephen Malkmus is an incredible musician and lyricist, and even though I am a bit biased, I really do think this album is his best since Pavement went on "hiatus." The songs stretch-out and get pulled apart, yet they remain focused and interesting. Malkmus remains his witty, wordplaying self, but he has developed and perfected a sound that is now an entirely different animal than his previous band. And I like that.

8. Oxford Collapse- Bits
OxC are constantly referred to as a throwback to college rock in the 80s sense of the term. While I understand such a description, I feel it is a disservice to this great band, since the music they make seems more vibrant than just a left-of-the-dial Frankenstein monster. On Bits, the band keeps its bouncy, pulsating sound, but they have become more consistent in crafting a complete record, at least compared to their last album. "The Birthday Wars" is one of the best songs the band has written, but the album as a whole works because other tracks like "Back of the Yards" and "B-Roll" help paint a fuller picture. (Full Disclosure: The band gave me a free button after I saw them live so I am naturally eternally indebted).

7. The Walkmen- You & Me
I have long been a fan of music that sounds somehow anachronistic. This album feels to me that it was recorded in some other time, likely somewhere far away. You and Me manages to create an aura and a pervasive mood, yet at the same time it doesn't feel stale and stagnant. Hamilton Leithauser's unique voice is able to shine in standout tracks like "In the New Year." The band has developed a distinct sound that is vibrant and swoony. The Walkmen are a solid indie rock band that appears understated, yet they somehow have created an album that feels as vital and significant as any classic album should feel.

6. Okkervil River- The Stand Ins

I really dug The Stage Names and after seeing the band perform this summer, I had high expectations for this album. This companion album is as strong as its predecessor, highlighting Will Sheff's trademark witty songwriting. I certainly like bands that are literate and sometimes force me to Wikipedia lyrical references to find out what they're talking about. This album is not weighed down by purely intellectual discourse, though. The songs are catchy, well-orchestrated pieces that would stand up even without smarty pants name-dropping. The band shows emotional urgency on "Blue Tulip" and pointed social critique on "Pop Lie." And if I were making a list of the best songs of 2008 (though sadly I am not), "Lost Coastlines" would definitely make a good showing. All told, it's a great album from a great band.

5. No Age- Nouns
Out of pure principle, I dismissed No Age before I even listened to them. The HYPE surrounding the band and this album before its release seemed to be quite heavy, and I was (quite wrongly) turned off before I had turned up. Once I heard a few tracks off Weirdo Rippers, I became intrigued. When I finally heard this album, I became obsessed. The album captures a lot of the sounds and feelings in older songs by great bands, yet it manages to not sound derivative, but totally fresh and new. I am a sucker for at least a moderate level of "lo fi" noise-ish music, so this album does not disappoint in that department. Much like Times New Viking, No Age manage to to scratch out beautifully catchy and compact tunes out of a muck of seeming disorder. As urgent and restless as the album seems, nearly every part feels like the right part. The band also deserves props for appearing on MTV this summer and premiering the video for "Eraser" on FNMTV--certainly an improvement over Miley Cyrus.

4. Women- Women
Somewhere in the blog vortex, I stumbled upon the song "Black Rice" a few months ago. I was, frankly, floored. I waited patiently for the Albertans' album to be released south of the border and when it did, I found my way down to CD Alley to pick it up. Quite surprisingly, the album was even more adventurous than even "Black Rice" had indicated it would be. It's like a swirl of chimes and fuzz and melody and jaggedness that seems to fit together just right. I admittedly know less about this band than any other on this list, which partially explains why I have been surprised at my own reaction to it. It feels somewhat mysterious in that way; it is a puzzling concoction of sounds and melodies that just happens to include everything I would hope to find in a solid album- a little bit of melody, a little bit of noise, a little bit of jigsaw puzzle. Without having much backstory, I am intrigued by which direction this band will take, but if this album is any indication, it should be quite interesting.

3. Los Campesinos!- Hold on Now Youngster/ We Are Beautiful, We Are Doomed

Firstly, let me state that these are definitely two distinct albums. I decided to put them as one since the band released them within the same calendar year, and I could have easily placed either in this position, so I decided to put them together. I can think of no other band that seems more "2008" than this one, and not just because they released two albums and supplied a great deal of the soundtrack of my year. Something about the youthful exuberance, the subsurface twittering angst, the angular and lushly orchestrated guitars and shouting. Maybe it's the subtle rage, the chaos of seven musicians, the rambling blog-like confessionals, the elation and the downgazing jitter, or something else entirely, this band just seems to be very much of the times. That being said, the melodies and the poignancy of these works seem to indicate that these albums will be seen as more than flashes in the pan in the future. I am very much looking forward to seeing the band live in a couple weeks, and hearing what their musical progression in the coming years.

2. Dodos- Visiter

My first experience with this band came in the form of the song "Fools," which I found to be amazing and haunting. The whole of Visiter is frighteningly real and alive. It is a juxtaposition of simplicity and complexity, ease and discomfort. There are enough layers that even after countless times listening to it, I still feel like I am hearing it for the first time. Every song on this album works individually and as part of a larger piece of art. If there were an award for the album I've listened to the most this year, Visiter would win it. It has just seemed appropriate on roadtrips, rainy afternoons, or a late night of conversation. It is a testament to this album's depth that the diverse number of people I have shared it with have come away with similar positive impressions.

1. Deerhunter- Microcastle/Weird Era Continued

I thought Cryptograms was a great album, but I didn't really expect to like Deerhunter's latest as much as I have. In seeing Deerhunter live a couple months ago, I really felt I was witnessing something great, something quite important. Maybe it's the volume or the intoxicating nature of massive guitars, but Deerhunter blew me away. Out of the tons of songs on these two discs, there are too many standouts to even count, though "Nothing Ever Happened," "Twilight at Carbon Lake" and "Vox Celeste" are all excellent. The songs all seem to grow and twist in interesting and surprising ways, though they are never seem to be overdone. Bradford Cox's voice seems to float down from the heavens and glide around the guitar-driven force. This band has managed to melt its impressive and disparate influences into a new form that feels familiar and brand new at the same time. The album is dizzying and impatient and powerful and timeless. In short, it's the best album I've heard in 2008. So there.

Other Mentionables of Honour: Beach House-Devotion, Titus Andronicus- The Airing of Grievances, Born Ruffians- Red, Yellow and Blue, The Sea and Cake- Car Alarm, Vivian Girls- s/t, Someone Still Loves You Boris Yeltsin- Pershing

the tropical, islamic state

2007-09-16T20:11:00.000-04:00

there is a place that will seemingly stop at nothing until its symbol covers every manmade thing as far as the eye can see. until every man, woman and child is draped in it and parades it around proudly for all the world to see. this is all likely for no other reason than to make every human being ponder that place and what it stands for when you are awake, when you are asleep, when you are dead. i, of course, am talking about our delightful neighbor that we sit overtop-- the fine state of south carolina. i don't know who came up with the whole palmetto-crescent moon thing, but whoever he/she was, was a pure genius. i come into contact with few symbols that pop up into my vision during my daily life with as much zest and zeal as the good ole s.c. standby. no, friends, it's not syria or indonesia, it is the state with spanish moss, "smiling faces, beautiful places," myrtle beach and barbeque with mustard (yark). and if you are fortunate enough to visit the carolina cup in the quaint hamlet of camden, you will know what it is like to swim amongst a symbol, and eat and drink of it.

maybe this is too harsh. perhaps i am just jealous. while the university of north carolina has the only symbol of worth that could cover our entire state (the tar on the heel of the foot), our flag gives us no help. red, white, and blue? how original. a star? unthinkable. two dates that mean nothing but to north carolina history scholars and 8th grade social studies classes? astounding. and someone even had the bright idea to slap a big "n" and a big "c" on it, so we can't even try to pass it off as someone else's. and it looks too eerily like a certain other state's flag that we have been told not to mess with.

so maybe i just wish we had a cool symbol we could slap on the back of every car, dye onto every belt, sew onto every hat and print onto every t-shirt. i wish someone would create a symbol that even residents of neighboring states would feel naked without ("oh, we live quite close enough, i do believe the symbol of their state is appropriate for our automobile"). or maybe, north carolina should realize we have it good enough. we stood too long in the shadows of the "tall mountains" of south carolina and virginia and following their direction today just wouldn't do. yes, i believe north carolina cannot be reduced to mere flora and a vanishing satellite shining on the back of a chevy pickup. north carolina's strength lies in its hard-working families, its rich history, its humble nature yet progressive spirit, and its diversity of landscape, people and ideas (guess who employs me). but, if that's not marketable enough, we can always use a lighthouse.

1: where is my mind?-- the pixies

2007-09-13T18:37:00.000-04:00

all of the suspense that has been building in your soul, all those sleepless nights since this countdown began august 2nd end here and now. this song gets the top spot as the song that has most changed my life. and really, it makes a lot of sense. this was one of the first songs i heard by the pixies at the beginning of my sophomore year of high school. i don't remember how they came into my life other than the they were dropped from the heavens (or maybe they were recommended by an older cool kid). my reaction was nothing short of fanatical. it seems like within two weeks of hearing this song, i owned every pixies cd ever recorded and had downloaded every b-side and rarity that fearsome foursome had so perfectly performed. that entire sophomore year consisted of me and my boarding school roommate playing every pixies album on repeat day and night. every song became ingrained into my soul. we bought magazines and cut out pictures of the band and put them on the walls. i talked about them at dinner, dreamt of them in my sleep, forced them upon others-- it was intense. this fascination, coupled with the brave new world of boarding school, made everything seem more significant and more real. the two are forever connected in my mind.

the pixies were unlike anything i had heard, though i could pull out bits and pieces in their music of every band i had been obsessed with before. the quiet/loud elements and jagged guitars reminded me of nirvana. the singsong pop reminded me of the beach boys. but there was something else about them that was humorous, bizarre, mysterious, fun and quirky. they seemed to fit my personality well and i was hooked and have remained hooked ever since.

this song is prodigious. it is eerie and angular and strange, yet it is poppy and funny and soothing. it rocks, yet holds back from being a fullout rock song. even though black francis sings of sea creatures swimming in the caribbean, they seem like the most thoughtful, fitting lyrics that could have possibly been devised. it represents everything that i find wonderful about the pixies. besides being the crack in the dam that unleashed a flood of pixies obsession, this song is significant because it has never seemed to leave my life since i first heard it. later in high school, i remember singing this song in my (failed and shortlived) experience in a band (though it made me feel cool). right after high school graduation, this song was played as i rode in the backseat from myrtle beach to north carolina and it blew my mind again (if you understand the significance of this, good. if not, you wont get an explanation here). i tried to learn to play this song when i finally got a guitar in college. and i still listen to 'surfer rosa' as i drive to work.

i cannot imagine my life without this song and this band; they have done more for me than any other song or band i have encountered. after hearing this song, i went from being someone obsessed with a few bands to someone who couldnt sleep because they couldnt stop thinking about all the music that was out there to listen to. my musical taste and knowledge expanded greatly. i began to look deeper and wider and discover music that was not played on the radio and was not being talked about with my friends. i relished being into music that was different and really got to me. it helped define who i was. it opened my eyes. it connected with me on a new level. it changed my life. i can safely say, without this song, i wouldnt be coming home from work and writing about music on a stupid blog every day. 'where is my mind?' is also fitting for this spot on the countdown because it sounds like the end of something, something that trails off into the distance, into the darkness.

pixies, alive: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gGXdXcpNsv4

2: in my room-- the beach boys

2007-09-09T20:37:00.000-04:00

yes, another selection by the smiley sunsoaked band from california. even i was surprised by how high on the list this song ended up, but the more i thought about it, the better i understood. the beach boys have had a profound impact on my life. from a very early age (they were my first concert after all). i feel like they influenced me so heavily and so early on that they have informed everything i have listened to. i have always had a deep appreciation for this song. its harmony, its soft flow, its endearing pop, its youthful sentiments. it is a deceptively simple song that has can appeal to a wide audience. it was not until recently, though, that i realized what kind of impact this song had on me.

i dont know when i first heard this song. it was not on the 'made in u.s.a.' compilation that i obsessed over at a young age, but i know i was familiar with this song around the time i was listening to that album. my first experience must have been on the radio. in fact, i have a vague memory of me asking my mother to turn this song up when we were driving around town in her station wagon (this takes it way back). but regardless of when i first heard it, there was something that connected me to this song at age 7, age 12, age 17, and even today.

if the song 'basket case' represents one strain of my musical preference (the coolness factor), this song represents the beginning of its opposing strain: the personal song. this song became differentiated in my mind from songs about the wheels on the bus, the itsy bitsy spider and even songs about daddy taking the t-bird away. for the first time, i heard and felt in music what i was thinking. and though it wasnt complex, it was a sentiment i could relate to and feel a part of. they were singing about feelings that everyone could understand, no matter what age you were. after hearing this song, music began to mean something totally different than what i had thought it could. it was no longer something that was something to have on to pass the time or something to be done in music class at school. you could use it to connect. you could use it to learn something. you could use it to feel.

if music in my life appeals to me in three different ways (for its functionality, for how it makes me feel cool, for its emotional connection), it is the strain that i discovered in this song that has dictated the majority of my musical preference. i like stuff that i can hear and feel a part of, something that is emotionally revealing. stuff that is deep. stuff that makes you feel that indescribable feeling that absolutely great music conjures up inside of me. music that is thoughtful and personal in varying shades of pop has defined my musical life. this explains why i liked nirvana, sebadoh, coldplay, the replacements, otis redding, and most of the music on this list. years and years after i first heard this song i feel connected to it and i seek out songs that do for me what this song did. so, yeah, even though i never would have guessed it, this song is a very fitting choice for the second spot on this list.

i was there, i swear: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YabBXayt3bs

3: smells like teen spirit-- nirvana

2007-09-05T20:00:00.000-04:00

this song came close (very close) to not making it on the list at all. while most of the songs here were ordered by a gutfeeling/streamofconsciousness type of decision making, this song began on the outside and i kept thinking about it and thinking about it and it kept inching its way to number three on the list. and this song does deserve this position despite my initial reluctance to put it here.

i should explain why my first impulse did not accept this song with open arms. it has to do with overexposure, both self-inflicted and on a more global scale. i felt that it was too cliche for someone who had grown up in the shadow of 1991/generation x to include this song in a list of songs that had changed their life. so much has been said and written about this song, even sixteen years after its first appearance, that i began to feel that it didnt have much of a legitimate place in my life. it felt like something outside of me. even now, on the rarer and rarer occasions that i put on 'nevermind,' i will skip over this song and listen to the rest of it.

but then i started thinking back. to that time in 3rd grade when one of my friends brought 'nevermind' on the bus when we were on a field trip, and not that i even remember the music, but i do remember how funny i thought it was that there was a naked baby on the cover. i remember watching mtv with my babysitter shortly after kurt cobain had died and being really fascinated and puzzled by it all. i remember how it was still cool in 5th grade to sing songs off 'nevermind' while we rode bikes around the neighborhood. i remember how i would borrow this cd from a friend while on church retreats (and feel like a hardened rebel even though i was still afraid of buying the album myself because my parents might see the cover). and the list goes on. and i could not think of many periods in my life where this band and this song had not had an impact on me. i cannot even remember the exact moment i heard this song first, but it seems like it has always been there.

this song grew to represent a very complex set of things to me. it was rebellion, coolness, mystery. it became a representation of purity, youth, bygone days. it seemed like possibility, the apex of generational spirit, art. it stretched out to death, anger, rage. it became a monumental monster in my mind. as i aged, i kept longing for another song to come along and do what i believed (and had heard) this song did: break down walls, disrupt the status quo, win one for the good guys. i shudder to think of myself (and the world) without this song. while such sentiments feel dated to me now, i still can appreciate what this song actually was: a sharp, heavy mix of pop and hard rock that has the ability to make hearts run aflutter. and i do believe this song, this band, this album belong in a different category all together. in a glass case somewhere. and even when this song doesn't boom from my stereo speakers for months and months, i will still know what it did for me and for millions of others. and i guess that's pretty cool.

4: good morning captain-- slint

2007-09-04T21:26:00.000-04:00

it feels wrong even writing about this song. to me, this song is so good and means so much to me, that trying to put any of it into words would be a great disservice. but i guess i must provide something so you will understand why this song is ranked as high as it is.

to put it plainly, after hearing this song, music simply didnt sound the same. as new and different as this song sounded, it also touched on some expectation i had for what the greatest music in the world would sound like. like i had been waiting for something to sound like this. it was deep. bottom of the ocean deep. the song has an expansive drama that sucks you in. its not even like listening to a song. it is like having an experience.

again, i can't really explain what this song does to me. it is poetic and smart (any song that is even loosely based on a samuel taylor coleridge poem is by definition smarter than most anything you can listen to). but it is not just cerebral, the song also plays to the senses. you can see the mist coming off the water. you can feel the ship rocking on the waves. and then it builds, the tension, like ominous clouds gathering on the horizon. and then there is an explosion, where softly spoken words give way to screams and you can feel the brute force, the release. something that seems so delicate and calculating just cracks open to bare bones and grit and the basic essence of human emotion.

i can only say it was an act of god that made me download this song as a sophomore in high school. i otherwise have no idea what would have compelled me to seek out this relatively obscure band. it was another act of god that i finally found the album 'spiderland' in a sketchy record store in georgetown. but i am thankful i did. and when i finally got to hear this song played live this summer i literaly couldnt stop shaking. it was like hearing god. and once again, nothing sounds the same.

5: shit soup-- sebadoh

2007-09-03T20:51:00.000-04:00

i know i have gone on about how many times i have listened to certain songs on this list. but, to put an end to all speculation, this is, officially, the song i have listened to the most times in my life. and im serious. i went through phases where, even though i am more of an 'album person' than a 'song person', i would put this song on repeat and listen to it over and over and over again. in high school. in college. two weeks ago. and it's not like this is mozart or brainbending music or whatever. but it fits me well. and it has fascinated me.

i first heard of sebadoh through their lo-fi brethren, pavement. pavement had already solidified its place as one of my favorite bands, so i decided anyone that fit into their 'genre' would be worth checking out. problem was, i couldnt find any of their albums anywhere. after some time of searching, i found the album 'bakesale' and its naked baby playing in a toilet on the cover at a border's in pentagon city. and i don't think my life has been the same since. i remember running to a friend's room and making him listen to the album immediately because i had been so blown away. i knew then that this was another band i could obsess over (and i am fond of obsessing). the whole album was pretty much a revelation. it rocks just enough. it is just angular enough. it is just poppy/intelligent/bouncy enough. and it has the kind of smart confessional lyrics that i love. but the song that really sold me was 'shit soup,' a beauty written by jason lowenstein. this song reminds me of spinning. and the truth. (good things). and i dig any song about crazy people and smoking cigarettes. it is a lot like hazy-eyed longing and frustration and i thought it was incredible.

i have not stopped listening to sebadoh since i first heard 'bakesale.' and i have been fortunate enough to see them play live a couple times and they were awesome. what i really appreciate about them is how diverse their music can be, from a tape player recording of a guy with a guitar to full-band loud rock (that i can jump around to). and everything seems to work well. this song made an immediate impact on what i wanted to listen to. it made me get realize how much i liked music that was personal and also rocked a bit. i remember laying on my bed in high school listening to 'shit soup' and just thinking how much i liked this song, how this song just works for me so well. even today, not much has changed. and it is indeed true-- crazy people are so off they're on.

6: basket case-- green day

2007-08-31T18:14:00.000-04:00

i am not going to sit here and write about how this song reinvented rockmusic or how i can close my eyes when i hear this song and see magnificent colors. listening to this song as i write is honestly the first time i have heard it a long while. and i dont have a problem with that. but i must give credit where credit is due. this song has played a pretty important role in my life, even if it was a long time ago. now, i mean, i think it's still hyper and fun and funny and all that, not earth-shattering or anything. but once upon a time, this song meant something very different.

first of all, i must take you back to 1994. i am still young, innocent, and beginning to look outside mom and dad for self-validation. in the world that was my neighborhood, there was no better way to gain validation than to be accepted and well-liked by the older kids. for the first time, i was interested in being cool- doing what the older kids did, said, etc. (not that i knew exactly what coolness was, but i knew who possessed this quality). around this time, the album 'dookie' was as cool as cool could get on my block, at least in that it was being listening to by kids three or four years my senior. so the times i was around them (i am sure they appreciated my presence) i would rock out to this song, soaking in what they said about it, how they reacted. i learned the words to this song and remember singing it while playing basketball with the other kids. and i felt like a badass. it was my gateway to the other side. this song was an adolescent apple just beyond my grasp. but i called it mine and had to let everyone know about it.

so, maybe this song didn't make me any cooler. but, for the time being, i felt that it did. and it remained for a while as a standard bearer for what was cool. it represents the time when i started to turn to music to feel cool. for better or worse, this set the precedent for a large portion of my musical life. while this song is confined to that time period i have listened to it a good number of times through the years, and i guess i could have listened to worse songs to feel cool. the good part about my fascination with the song was that i continued to seek out stuff that seemed just out of my reach, stuff that seemed edgy (to me), stuff that seemed cool. what if dr. dre had been popular on chad drive at the time? would i now be a fifty cent fan? i don't know, but if my musical track were in doubt before, latching on to this song assured that poppypunkyrocky ridiculousness would be the mode of operation for most of my days. so, as much as it pains me to say, without this song's place in my life, it's doubtful that my musical taste would have developed the way that it did.

ah yes, they did exist before american idiot: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W8Y3qDDODT0

7: chapel hill-- sonic youth

2007-08-30T19:01:00.000-04:00

more chapel hill-relatedness. perhaps i am pining for the past. or whatever. i have listened to this song approximately 73,542 times. which is quite a lot. part of this has to do with an old tradition i had where i would put this song on every time i drove into chapel hill (somehow the album 'dirty' was always on hand, i guess since i have both the originial and special editions). but this song, especially the initial part, reminds me of a sunrise coming up over the ancient oaks off franklin street. and it grooves well and builds and builds and rocks out incredibly (which worked well with driving up the 'hill.') if you learn only one thing from this list, it should be that songs with a monumental climax alter my dna more than those without one. this song, quite interestingly has a denouement after the climax, which is also quite nice.

this was not the first sonic youth song i heard or even the one i think is their best. i got 'dirty' sometime after i got 'washing machine' which is sometime after i started thinking sonic youth was really groovy. what got me about this song was its ability to rockout, change pace, create mood, and twist lyrics into fascinating puzzles (and i was very proud to know what was hinted at by the line "throw me a cord and plug it in and get the cradle rockin'"). it also has signature sy guitar tricks that my novice mind cannot comprehend, but it makes sounds that grip you differently, stuff that is maddeningly enthralling. and there is a memory that goes along with this song. when i was a junior in high school, one night upon finding out that classes were cancelled the next day, my friends and i decided to trash my room for the hell of it. i mean topple bunkbeds, rip sheets, tear things off walls, throw books, etc. (ah, youthful rage). well we played this song on the stereo several times over with the volume up and it overtook me with madness, jumping around and the like. which is pretty cool.

this song affected me because it is a good rockin song with nods towards artistic sensibilities and musical complexities (in some ways a good bullshit summation of my musical taste). i also realized through this song how music could make me explode, and when turned to the correct volume, made trashing things much more enjoyable. while i was already into sonic youth, this song certainly did nothing but deepen my fascination with a band i will probably never get over. i also appreciate this song for representing a time and a place, which is what makes music such an amazing thing anyway. and whenever i'm in the mood to jump around and throw my shoes (there's no more tossing of mattresses) this song feels as appropriate as it always has.

this is not a vid, but it is the song, with pictures: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CBivMTOOZFo

8: good vibrations-- the beach boys

2007-08-29T19:42:00.000-04:00

an excellent song by my first ever favorite band. from ages 5 until 8, i was pretty much obsessed with the beach boys. i don't remember where it all started, but i do remember listening to the compilation 'made in the u.s.a.' over and over again. the words were easily understandable and easy to sing along to for a young kid. and since i was still afraid of mtv at this point, this was my musical outlet, something that i could listen to without the help of the radio. it also seemed more mature to me than childish songs that i didn't feel applied to me anymore. so while this whole compilation was huge for me, it was track number 14, 'good vibrations,' that ended up changing my life the most.

even at this young age, i knew something was different about that song. it didn't seem as simple or as comprehensible to me as 'fun, fun, fun' or 'barbara ann,' and that honestly puzzled me. i could not make out what they were singing about. i do remember thinking it was weird. but i also remember liking that fact. i wanted to know what it was about this song that made it seem different to me. why i would rather listen to this song than sing along or why i got so lost in it. it would be years before i would figure these things out, or at least come close to. but at least for the time being, it made me curious, and that is significant.

this song, like others on the list, has come and gone out of my life numerous times. no song on this list has probably made as many appearances at different points in my life. when i was like 12 or 13 i started to get into the more bizarre aspects of the beach boys and i loved when my uncle would tell stories about brian wilson going crazy and would play songs like 'george fell into his french horn'. this all fascinated me and re-opened my interest in 'good vibrations.' even today, this song hypnotizes me. it is like a spiral, a dizzying blur. i believe it is psychedelic pop perfection. it creates colorful collages for me now as it did then. for those reasons, and especially for opening my mind and for piquing my interest in music that challenged me, i will forever remain in brian wilson's debt.

nice suits: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BdVIrE_Q2X0

9: here-- pavement

2007-08-28T19:12:00.000-04:00

i considered only letting there be one song per band on this list. but i figured that wouldnt be right. some bands have just been more important than others. so, here is the second pavement selection. one that did not enter my life as early as 'grounded,' but has likely had a longer impact on me. i did get the album 'slanted and enchanted' shortly after i got 'wowee zowee,' and honestly, i thought every song was gold. all the tunes were both slanted and enchanted. they had some kind of magic about them (and a light fuzzy upsidedown pop). but no song stood out to me on the album like the song 'here.'

the song is deceptively simple. it is a pop song, but like most of pavement's work, it twists and turns and bends backwards in ways that make it sound perfectly complete and deep and complex. it has a gentleness about it, like it is something fragile, something delicate. in some ways, it seems to be the personification of a shrug. i can visualize some kid (me?) with his head down, hands in pockets. there is an honesty about the whole thing that i found to be very real and clear. the lyrics, typical of the s. malkmus style, are smarter than i am (or at least seem to be), and i liked that. but you still can understand what he's going after. and there is this background tension that builds behind the light melody. it somehow gets extended and released at the end of the song so that its conclusion could not make sense any other way.

this song made me consider music that fit outside the mold of what i had liked prior. i found i really could like stuff that was softer. the fact that it was creative, intelligent, unique and conveyed a universally understood sentiment made it perfect. songs like this made me appreciate more challenging lyrics. stuff that made you think a little bit. this song also gets the nod because it has not seemed to go out of my life since i first heard it. it just seems to find a place wherever i end up, and i think that's pretty cool. i guess its subdued splendor has not lost its effect on me (and i guess a guess is the best i'll do).

10: little fury things-- dinosaur jr

2007-08-27T19:38:00.000-04:00

this song fits the type of dynamics that i became obsessed with in high school and still sends shockwaves down my spine today. it was something about stuff that sounded like a mess, like destruction, like a trainwreck, that fascinated me. this was what i knew. what i did not know is how much i dug destructive music that had direction, that had a balance and a contrast. but i figured all that out when i heard this song.

already a fan of dinosaur jr through the album 'green mind', i decided to pick up the only other disk i could find by them at the time- a compilation called 'ear-bleeding country', which contained this song. 'little fury things' possesses nearly every element i could want in a single song: noise, screaming, loudness, shoddy production values, but also words you can sing along to, something that changes shapes, goes from quiet to loud, and has lazy sounded singing. at the time, it all seemed new, but it made perfect sense. though in some ways, it fit the conception i had of what late 80s indie rock should sound like, it also broke the mold and exceeded my expectations.

this song made me understand what i liked about contrasts. and what i liked about slackerish, massive music (and it is massive). i found that laconic vocals perhaps are best. the song has a certain mystique about it, it is different and badass and effortless. it has a sound and an image that defined my understanding of this amazing band. while i had heard dinosaur jr before, this song struck me differently than what i had heard on 'green mind.' without having experienced this song, i don't believe i ever would have had a dinosaur jr party in college (or had someone make me a dinosaur jr cake). the band was and is ridiculously good. they could one second sound folksy and detached and the next sound like the heaviest and holiest hand of death. and i think it's unbelievable. i have not heard a band do it better (and i doubt one ever will).

total destruction: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sXfR-64YtQ0

11: yellow-- coldplay

2007-08-23T19:45:00.000-04:00

first off, i am being serious. 'yellow' is a great song and coldplay is a good band. i can admit that. i am not clear as to what made me place this song at this point on the list. perhaps now, after getting to song number 11, i should better explain how i made my list. after racking my brain, scouring my cd collection, sifting through my ipod, i came up with a list of 156 possible songs. then i whittled the list down and down and down, got it to 40something, then ranked them, in almost a firstimpulse/streamofconsciousness (which i think is the best way to do things) kind of way. and this song, for better or worse, landed here. i believe there is something behind it.

now for the backstory. this song was one of the first new ones i heard in 10th grade, my first year at boarding school. (i feel this has something to do with my attachment). at the time, i had never heard of coldplay, but i instantly thought they were awesome. they were in some ways smoothly mellow and hopelessly romantic. which i kind of liked. this song plods (in a beautiful way) and has these very windswept sappy-eyed heart-tugging lyrics and sound that convey a sort of longing that i found sublime. and perhaps i still do. i hung on this song and the album 'parachutes' for quite a while during those first few months. they still take me back.

this song is for me a time and a place and a feeling. things that are both concrete and vague. i think this song was an expression of beauty for me, something i wanted to seek out. and before this song and this band blew up, i felt it to be very personal and close to me. it also introduced me to a band that i still think makes quality stuff. so i guess, even though my perspective has changed, i can still appreciate what this song once did for me.

the video, with love: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qI8I6qcxWyU

p.s. alas. i am going away for a few days, so you will have to wait on the top 10 until next week.

12: everlong-- foo fighters

2007-08-22T19:14:00.000-04:00

maybe i got too into the foo at some point. there was certainly a time when i would have considered them my alltime favorite band. and while i think they have some quality stuff now, looking back, i dont have the same adoration i used to. and i guess that's okay. there is one foo fighters song, though, that has remained, if not gathered strength in my mind-- everlong. on 'the colour and the shape,' this song did and does stand out above the rest.

i still find it to be mysterious sounding. i still think of fog and eerie light when i hear this song. it was serious where much of the foo material seemed somewhat light. like so many songs i like, it builds well. the part where dave grohl whispers and then the percussion and volume come slamming back into the song is revelatory. monumental. and, as with the best foo fighter songs, you can sing along to it, rock out to it.

this song serves as a connection to my past self and my present one, i guess (that sounds pretty ridiculous). a song i can listen to, as i did then, and think is quality music that still sounds fresh and real and has meaning. this band and this song rightly hold an important place in my life and i guess that deserves credit. it also, in some ways, made me consider music that went beyond the type of stuff the foo was making at the time. stuff that had more mystery. stuff that seemed more serious.

and the video is righteous (and funny, which is ok): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OHdwZCVZmg8

13: sixteen blue-- the replacements

2007-08-21T20:44:00.000-04:00

two minneapolis bands from the same time period back-to-back. good planning. this was the first of the two minnesota bands to catch my eye (ear). the replacements album 'let it be' was a pretty big deal to me, though i am not exactly sure what inspired me to purchase it. but i'm glad i did. i thought it was a good mix of pop and rock and punk. the music was witty and very endearing in how it was so adolescent. i remember thinking that if i had a band and made an album, it would be a lot like this.

i, coincidentally, first heard this song at the age of sixteen, which may explain why i connected so strongly with it. at that time in my life, it just made sense. i remember thinking, yes, everything does "drag and drag" as paul westerberg sang that it did. the lyrics were nothing complicated but they seemed so confessional and seemed to strike on something that reached beyond one person's experience that i believed every word. westerberg's voice flawlessly carried the forlorn frustration that often accompanies those teenage years. then came the guitar solo. it sliced, screeched and while not very complex, it is probably the most beautiful solo i've ever heard. its tone and power serve as perfect complements to the rest of the song.

this song resonated with me because it captured what i was thinking at the time. it seemed to be the logical conclusion of the bottled up rage and angst that comes with adolescence. this song made me consider what makes people write music. what drives people to express themselves. it also made me seek out more music that really got at what i was thinking at the time-- something that has been a part of my understanding of music ever since.

14: eight miles high-- husker du

2007-08-20T20:02:00.000-04:00

yes, this is a cover. the first (last?) one on this list. it is, of course, a classic byrds fried folk song. the byrds song is accordingly ripped to shreds by one of the finest bands of the 80s that, at least early on, was hellbent on playing faster and louder than anybody. husker du takes this song, throws it in a blender and shoots it out like a water hose onto a crowd. it's a mess. but, that's what makes this song so great.

it takes skill to destroy something perfectly and still maintain a connection with the original material. glimpses of this song's roots seem to appear from behind the fuzz every once in a while and certain lyrics can be recognized through bob mould's screams. but more than that, this song captures an escalation of the mood from the original song. it takes it to another level. nearly a level of madness. this song blew me away upon first listen. i thought i was hearing someone in the process of losing their mind, losing control. it was like a dionysian frenzy, like a primal and natural purging.

i credit this song for heightening my interest in fuzzedout poppypunk laced with wellplaced yelling. i really liked the fact that people could put so much into their music that they seemed to be on the verge of losing it. most importantly, this song made me realize that cover songs didn't have to be rote, dry rehashing, but something new and empassioned. i saw that great covers show you something fresh and make you consider the originial in a different light. and this song certainly does that for me.

1985 performance (i remember it well): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=salbSLGlePM

15: the first part-- superchunk

2007-08-19T21:11:00.000-04:00

i, naturally, became interested in superchunk because they were from north carolina. knowing this and the fact that they were extremely cool punkpoprock whatever, i decided at some point in high school to check them out. the only cd i could find in rocky mount was 'tossing seeds,' which is a compilation of their early singles. i thought it was great. it was rough, fastpaced, upbeat, exciting. i desperately wanted to check them out in a real album format. and somehow, a couple months later, i ran into the album 'foolish.'

'foolish' threw me for a loop. from my limited knowledge, i hadn't expected superchunk to sound dark, sophisticated, complex. it was different. but i loved it. no song on the album connected stronger with me than 'the first part.' it had this bitter mood and somber lyrics and it built to an awesome climax. it combined much of what i liked in music at the time, namely emotion, music that was more complex than basic punk, and (most importantly) something i could jump around to.

this song reminds me of running cross country. back when i did the balancing act (im still not sure how) of carrying my portable cd player in one hand while running through the woods, i always put 'foolish' on. for some reason, this song made me run faster. and when i was in actual races, i remember trying to get the song in my head to help me pick up the pace (i did not master this well enough, apparently). i also have been fortunate to see this song performed twice live by superchunk, which did nothing but strengthen my appreciation for it. it's just an awesome song. and besides being a cross country standby, it propelled my interest in superchunk and in more independent label rock music. it also (thankfully) provided lots and lots of jumping around the room (and on beds and on couches, also throwing the occasional shoe) in both high school and college, and for that alone, this song deserves much credit.

video (the quality's not great and it is shorter than the album version, but anyway): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_yw0s6nRfN4

16: only shallow-- my bloody valentine

2007-08-17T23:22:00.001-04:00

i had not, and still have not, heard anything that compares with my bloody valentine's 'loveless' album. it's not just the apex of shoegazing music, it is a seminal recording in the history of rock music. it, accordingly, blew my mind. it was noisy, layered, wistful, powerful. it captured in art something very cerebral and something very real. i cant remember what made my high school hands pick up this album, but i am eternally thankful that they did.

'only shallow,' the first track on 'loveless' captures the best of the band's breadth and depth. it is dreamy and lush. it is vibrant and sleepy at the same time. the song has a way of lulling you one minute and pounding you into submission the next. it was after i had heard this song, the first mbv song i ever encountered, that i was sold. i knew just through this one song that this band was playing a different game than most of the bands i listened to. it captured a certain mood that i couldn't quite put my finger on but it felt very familiar (some kind of hazy feeling on a warm day or something).

i honestly believe this song expanded my mind. it made me excited about the possibilities of what else was out there. there were sounds coming out of the speakers that i didn't even know existed before. i was put in a trance by this song's veiled magic and even today i am moved by its force and beauty. it is otherwordly. there are few things as rewarding as turning off the lights and putting this song on the stereo at full blast. it takes you somewhere else. i feel fortunate to have come across it when i did because it has informed my musical taste and broadened my aural horizons.

good-ness: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Fxr0D-CWN4

17: harnessed in slums-- archers of loaf

2007-08-16T20:21:00.000-04:00

how could i not include this song? besides being the most listened to song on my itunes (quite an accomplishment), this song is probably the archetype of the music i was into posthighschoolgraduation and freshmanyear of college. which is mostly to say that i totally turned my focus to defunct indie bands, virtually shutting out the modern world. well kinda. the first thing i remember hearing about the archers of loaf was that they were from chapel hill, a place i thought was pretty cool (it would one day be my home). any band from n.c. obviously gets extra points. this was not one of the first songs i heard by them, but it was the one that stuck with me the longest (though most all of what they did was pretty rad).

i have tried to figure out why this song appealed (appeals) to me so much, and i cant quite figure it out. i like incomprehensible lyrics. i like loud guitars. i like music you can jump around to. so i guess it has all the ingredients. i dig the way sounds in this song seem to be pulling in different directions, seemingly falling apart, but it somehow stays together and rocks perfectly. the guitars make just enough off that messy, bizzare sounding crud to send me over the edge. and like a lot of archers songs, even though i didnt really understand what they were talking about, it sounded cool and it sounded right.

i think i am particularly a fan of songs that remind me of rolling around in the grass (not weird at all). perhaps it has to do with restlessness, harkening back to youthful days, simpler times, or whatever. all i know is this song creates that effect better than any song i have heard (also an accomplishment). for that reason, and for representing my musical taste for a large swath of a major time in my life (and also to driving me to near obsession) this song fits this list very well. (it is also a desperate plea for an archers of loaf reunion, if any of the former members happen to read this post...)

the video's good too: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=25ymumzyWMU

18: dead leaves and the dirty ground-- the white stripes

2007-08-14T20:17:00.000-04:00

something big was about to happen. i could feel it. the flowering of my generation was imminent. everyone would be jammin to garageish rock. boy bands would evaporate. flashy rap would disintegrate. there would be a woodstock and heightenedawareness and everything. standing at the forefront of this wouldbe revolution was the white stripes, donned in red and white. it would be glorious.

this, as you may know, never happened. but i wanted it to, especially after hearing this song. i had really dug the white stripes for a while when i heard 'dead leaves and the dirty ground.' the first i heard of them was their cover of "ashtray heart" or "sugar never tasted so good" or something like that. their alleged siblingness and frayed edges made the band especially intriguing. while i really liked them, i remember thinking they would never be big when i first heard them. later, they were surrounded by hype and media attention and i thought, at last, it is all happening. the white stripes along with bands like the strokes and the hives would revive rock music and lead us into the future. this song, the first track on 'white blood cells,' represents all those possibilities.

the song fit my expectations of what i wanted the white stripes to sound like. unkempt, hard, lovesick-- it was flawless. it was everything i wanted in music at the time. the line "every breath that is in your lungs is a tiny little gift to me" embodied what i liked about the white stripes so much-- it was endearing and a tad off. which was great. i have listened to this song innumerable times, but jack white's guitar still sounds like it could slice through a brick wall.

i credit this song for being the crux of my imagination about a new music revolution in 2001. but it also has remained a song i still appreciate from a band that i still think is awesome. and while they may not have started a music revolution, they have continued to make quality, quality stuff for some time. and thats good enough for me.

parfait: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_tr3OAWw1vc

19: karma police-- radiohead

2007-08-13T20:34:00.000-04:00

i vividly remember my first experience with this song. i was at home, watching mtv (i wasnt afraid at this point and they still played videos), mom was in the kitchen, it was almost time for dinner. then 'karma police' came on and i froze. this song, this eerie tune and bizarre video hypnotized me, mesmerized me. of course, it was one of those moments when mom started yelling that dinner was ready and i wasnt ready and she kept yelling and i didnt want to move and she came in the room and i was knocked out of my trance and forced to eat baked chicken or whatever it was. but i couldn't get that song out of my head. it was unlike anything i had heard at the time and i was intrigued. the video was almost unsettling, and i liked that (reminded me of my earlier mtv experiences). i remember watching mtv like a hawk after i saw that video, hoping that i would see it again. and i did, and it was as fantastic as before. i later saw the video for 'paranoid android' which was equally as puzzling. i eventually got 'ok computer' and it became one of my favorite albums.

this song gained new life for me in the summer of 2001 when i was in france. for some reason, i gravitated toward it again. i remember sitting on my makeshift bed (it was really a psychotherapist's couch) after my host family had gone to bed (there was still light outside) and staring out the window onto the rooftops of slightlydecaying paris and listening to this song on my portable cd player. i guess my earlier experience with this song connected well with the strange situation i was going through at the time. it just fit so well. and, for a second time, this song blew my mind.

i still think this song is amazing. i thought then, as i do now, that it sounds very modern and very much a part of the world that is going on right now. it has a way of seeming both spooky and calming. the song changes shapes as it progresses, but it all fits together perfectly. it is, in a word, exceptional. it played a big part in opening my mind to more music that challenged me. and it has provided a monumental background for several key moments in the past decade of my life. this list would be incomplete without it.

the vid is here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5LeLAELIxKY

20: when the levee breaks-- led zeppelin

2007-08-12T19:42:00.000-04:00

some songs affect you and you arent exactly sure why. dont get me wrong, i think this song's awesome. it's bluesy, rootsy, distant, and generally delicious (i dont know why that word came to mind). but, this song does not seem to fit with a lot of the other songs on the list in that it is not exactly an emotional downpour or a heartpounder or a mindblower. there are also other zeppelin songs i like better (like 'the ocean' and 'babe i'm gonna leave you'). but for some reason my mind gravitated toward this song when thinking about songs that changed my life and it felt right.

i am not certain when i first heard this song, but at the time, i did not know much of zep past the standard classic rock radio fare. and while i liked the whole 'stairway to heaven' thing, it didn't exactly bowl me over. this song, on the other hand, appealed to me as being extremely cool, genuinely and honestly badass. it had this kind of hardness about it that didnt seem like it was trying too hard. the guitar sounded otherworldly. robert plant's vocals were empassioned and raspy and dead on. it rocked, but in not in a headbanging way, and i liked that. it just seemed different.

this song also heavily reminds me of christmastime in the year 2000, though i am not exactly sure why. but it seems to fit that time in my life pretty well (something about cold, gray skies and this song connected.). i can credit this song for making me be more open to led zeppelin and classic rock in general, which did play a large part in the growth of my appreciation for music. while i am not currently a big classic rock fan, i still believe pretty much everything zeppelin did was genius, especially this song. it will remain eternally cool, and it was my hope then (and maybe now) that just a bit of that coolness would rub off on me.

21: grounded-- pavement

2007-08-10T21:25:00.000-04:00

as a sophomore in high school, i had heard a few pavement songs-- summer babe, cut your hair, maybe a couple others. i decided at that time they were good enough to be examined further, so one day at hastings i discovered wowee zowee (the only pavement album they had). even though it had none of the songs i was familiar with, i bought it anyway, hoping for the best. later that day i listened to that blue cd on the way back to alexandria on the train in my portable cd player. 'grounded', the fifth track, stood out for me from the start. it had this offkilter beauty about it that sounded very new to me. it was both shaky and gorgeously fluid. the lyrics were smart and puzzling. and it worked very well while looking out the window of a moving train.

in this song, like in many other pavement songs, the guitar tones were what really got to me. there was something different about the way this band could make them sound. they seemed to chime and then change direction and sound like a jagged knife in the heart. the dynamics were very intriguing. i decided i had to hear it all. i had to make pavement a part of my life.

great songs, songs that change your life, can take you back to what you were thinking/feeling when it first came into your life. and this song does that for me whenever i play it. but at the same time, i feel like the song has grown with me. it's not just a time capsule, but something i can turn on right now and hear something (feel something) new. this song should definitely receive credit for taking my understanding of pavement from "that band that did 'summer babe'" to recognizing them for being arguably (even though there's no argument) the finest band in the land in the 1990s. this song started my obsession with the band and with thoughtprovoking, unintentionallybeautiful indie rock that continues to this day.

a solid live performance of the song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ryh-bYA0_yY

22: i've been loving you too long-- otis redding

2007-08-09T21:12:00.000-04:00

just like many other songs on this list, this one seemed to fall in my lap unexpectedly. i had long recognized otis redding as the voice behind 'sittin on the dock of the bay,' a song i had definitely liked, but i am not sure what compelled me to download this song when i did (it was early college sometime). but there it was on my ipod one day. the first time i heard 'i've been loving you too long' i got chills. all the way from my feet to the top of my head. there was a connection. maybe it was the honesty in it. maybe it was the slow buildup that culminated in the release of such heavy emotion in redding's voice. i'm not sure what it was, but it got me thinking.

there is nothing more moving than hearing someone pour their heart and soul into something. maybe because there we recognize similar things inside ourselves-- people expressing the things we wish we could express. maybe that is the connection. this song does that, reaching down inside to some common denominator that seems more primal and real than so much music out there.

the sound of redding's voice tells a lot. there is something there that feels real, is real. the voice of someone who has been there. it is grit and it is dirt and it is honey and it is warmth.

sometimes music just makes you see more clearly. this song sortof opened my eyes in a way that i cannot exactly understand or explain. but it definitely got to me. and got me to further explore more of otis redding's work, which is all wonderful, wonderful stuff. more than anything, this song got me interested in the powerful forces that lie behind "soul" (in its musical and human forms).

an amazing performance from backintheday:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GGlKJDEI1Nk

23: footsteps-- pearl jam

2007-08-08T21:25:00.000-04:00

this song came out of nowhere. pearl jam had already been well established as one of my favorite bands. i had all their albums, i had posters, a t-shirt, etc. i figured i knew them pretty well. one day in high school (back when rocky mount had a cd store) i came across the single for 'jeremy' which had this little girl with a gun on it. having only 2 other singles of anything in my entire collection (soundgarden and radiohead ones), i figured this would be a good add. and it had 'yellow ledbetter' on it, which was awesome, and it was cheaper than a full album. there was just this one song in the middle of those two. i didnt care what it was or what it sounded like-- i was going to buy the cd.

upon first listen i realzed that footsteps, sandwiched between 2 pearl jam classics, hit me in a way that neither of those songs, nor any other pearl jam song, had. maybe it was the timing, or the weather or something, but i heard something in eddie vedder's voice that i had not recognized earlier. it sounded like a confessional, a man at the end of his rope purging himself of heartache and frustration. and it felt so real. the music was stripped down and quiet, and vedder's voice seemed to slice through the silence. i was impressed. taken aback. the lyrics and vocals went hand in hand and told a story that seemed very truetolife. and you felt it.

this song made me realize how much i appreciated deeply personal music. it was a song i turned to on several occasions during the teenage years just because there were times the song seemed to fit so well. it also made me look at pearl jam differently, which was both good and bad. in some ways, my connection to their music became stronger, but at the same time i began to question why this song had stood out as feeling so real after having listened to the rest of their stuff. are they not always so genuine? these were things i would think on later, but for the time, this song provided a source for purging and for looking at things more serious.

24: you oughta know-- alanis morissette

2007-08-07T20:43:00.000-04:00

finally. an angry rock song by a canadian lass that you can sing along to. and it has the f-word (the christmas present i had been waiting for). i mean, to my juvenile brain, this song was very racy and very (strangely) exciting. and i definitely appreciated the fact that the words were discernible, though, knowing what was being sung did not exactly mean that i undertood it (going down?).

back then, if we let this cd get played in the car with mom driving, we always had to skip over track number 2. i also recall older kids in the neighborhood coming over and being impressed that we had the cd (technically my sister and i owned it collectively). so the magic of alanis was double: unacceptable for mom. accepted by older kids. score.

for me, this song had edge; at the time, i had never heard a woman sound so angry, and to a notsoangry 5th grader, it was very compelling. the sexual element of the song also made it downright scandalous (which was kinda cool). it had an element of rebellion in it; a song i could listen to in private but never around adults, and i liked that. it was kind of at that point where deviance in a more adolescent form was becoming evident (like cussing to be cool, which i unfortunately attempted) and this song fit that for me. the timing, attitude and lyrics of this song perhaps ushered me further along that road to being well, more immature (in that olderthan5thgrade kind of way). thanks, alanis.

25: mojo pin-- jeff buckley

2007-08-06T20:52:00.000-04:00

i was riding in the car past the cow pasture on hunter hill road and i thought i had heard the voice of god. the voice had depth-- it was sweet, clear, heavenly, unlike anything i had heard before. i was floored. i was enthralled. this song was my introduction to jeff buckley, who at that time i had read about (i knew of his mysterious death in the mississippi river), but had never heard his voice. in this song, while i drove down that rural road, his vocal chords from underneath the murky waves grabbed me by the throat (and didnt let go).

i was so used to listening to garbled yelling voices, gruff masculine huffs muffled under roaring guitars in my version of rocknroll. this was like a slap in the face. his voice kept changing directions, tones- it could be so so soft and also soar over powering guitars. it was more like watching a picture being painted than listening to music. this song, especially, showed off buckley's prowess; it snakes around and slowly steps up steps to a climax that displays the rich span of his voice.

but it wasnt just someone with a great voice. the song had power. i couldnt believe that rock and vocals could fit together so well. this song changed my opinion about how vocals could be incorporated into rock music. i also became obsessed with buckley for a while (i wrote a poem sometime in high school about the album this song is on). but above that, i became more tuned in to beautiful sounds in unexpected places. i learned that you can have interesting music with the vocals as the centerpiece. it was, for me, perfection, and i couldnt imagine those high school years without it.

26: another set of bees in the museum-- olivia tremor control

2007-08-05T19:53:00.000-04:00

more maddening music. but not in a bloodpumping kind of way. this is a more calculated madness. it has a psychedelic quality that seems harder to find in much modern music. it twists and turns in lots of puzzling ways and seems to be glued together like a collage. the lyrics seem nonsensical, but in the grand kaleidoscope of this song, they just fit. this, to me, seemed like it was recorded on another planet (or at least no where i had been). it really got to me.

i had been a fan of olivia tremor control for a while before i heard this song, which i guess i came into contact with on the internet early in college. in a lot of ways, otc was a throwback to some of the best 60s music, but they somehow always managed to not seem derivitive. no matter what the band was doing, but especially in this song, they continued to push envelopes and boundaries. i was fortunate to see a band formed in the wake of otc's breakup (the circulatory system) a couple years ago and they also happened to blow my mind.

this song, certainly, heightened my interest in otc, but it also made me crave more music that challenges, music that makes you feel weird. (and that weird feeling has changed my life.)

trippy: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6vtyPhVKByg

27: frontier psychiatrist-- the avalanches

2007-08-04T23:15:00.000-04:00

i have always been fascinated by madness. caligula (the one who appointed his horse to the senate) was always my favorite roman emperor. my interest in that which deviates from the accepted mental functioning is probably what led me to study psychology in college. it also may explain why i was so drawn to this avalanches song. it is maddening. it also happens to deal with mental illness. it seems to be a bizarre amalgam of random pieces but it flows seamlessly-- clips of sound that seem to pull in all directions are somehow contained within the framework of a song.

i bought this album in high school on a whim. i probably had read the band's name somewhere and decided i should have it. while the rest of the disk is extremely solid, this track blew my mind. it intrigued and puzzled me. it made my heart jump. this was not the type of music i listened to and this song made me wonder why. this song opened my eyes as to what could be incorporated into music to make old things new and insane. and yes, i learned, some birds are funny when they talk.

the vid (with a ghost choir) is spectacular: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U8BWBn26bX0

28: 1979-- the smashing pumpkins

2007-08-04T15:03:00.000-04:00

there is not a whole lot i can say about this song. i thought it was gorgeous when i first heard it and i think it's gorgeous now. its calm with undertones of tension resonated with me early on in a way that other things i listened to at the time (bush, silverchair) did not. the song immediately brings back memories of sixth grade: playing basketball in the driveway, riding bikes around the neighborhood, hanging out at austin's. it also brings up the apprehension i remember feeling about the looming adolescent years. the song's tone and its flawless video did a lot to make me seriously ponder the music i would listen to, the things i would do as a teenager. it scared me and kindof made me excited all the same. 1979 came along when i thought it was nearly time to start being "mature." it gave me a lot to think about when i would shoot hoops after school. and i figured then that this song was the emodiment of my future.

check the vid and its rolling tires: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6EWw-gsx_Io

29: why does it always rain on me?-- travis

2007-08-03T19:20:00.000-04:00

perhaps it was fate that this song came out around ninth grade-- a time dripping with "why does it rain on me?" type questions, i guess. i think i was looking for something else to listen to, having felt disconnected from the new modern rawk trend by this time that 96rock was jumping all over. i also was watching mtv again and i think they played videos, at least occasionally, at this point. i do remember seeing this video and thinking that it captured how i felt at the time. which is incredibly lame. but when you're 15, such things cannot be helped.

this song, besides sating me with its hearttugging qualities, did several other things for me. it turned me on to more introspective, mellow music, at least for a while (i started listening to elliot smith and the like shortly thereafter). so it was a nice change from all that nu metal or whatever it was called. it also was one of the first songs i remember pursuing vigorously on the internet (and then listening to over and over again while i strained my eyes playing solitaire). and the song helped usher in the longrunning pleasure of namedropping a band most people hadn't heard of.

today, i still think the song is pretty good. every time i pull out this travis album, i am reminded of my adolescent moping period, which is both good and bad of course. though the song is very gray and dreary, at the same time, i remembering being comforted that there were indeed likehearted souls wandering the earth aimlessly and asking depressing questions (just like me!).

for those of you not familiar with the tune, you can check it out on youtube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nwh3FmpZ7kg

30: like a prayer-- madonna

2007-08-02T21:13:00.001-04:00

i know, i know. this looks ridiculous. i mean, who starts a countdown at 30? well, i do. and yes, i begin with "like a prayer." of course. i think it is fair to say that any song that makes you cringe nearly 20 years after you first hear it has to be included in a list of songs that changed one's course of life. it may seem random, but it really isn't.

i remember the first time i heard this song. vividly. i was at my grandmother's house, watching television with my older (and much cooler) cousins. they, like most cool teenagers at the time, were watching mtv. and, they made me and my virgin ears and eyes partake in its barrage of images and sounds at a very early age. (they used to make me call in to request videos, but that is a different story). i can't give you a date for when i saw this video, but my best guess is 1989, which puts me at the ripe old age of 5. i don't know if you have seen the video, but it's scary. burning crosses, bleeding hands, moving statues-- way too much for me then and now. but the connection i formed between the video and the song stuck with me for a long time. even today, if i'm at an establishment made for drinking and the shaky words, "life is a mystery.." start slithering from the speakers (even before all the girls start to scream), i cringe and feel like curling into a ball and hiding under a table.

but, i guess, this song did do several other things. firstly, it made me terrified of mtv for a while. i was later reluctant to watch it with my cousins because i feared they would try to torture me with more gory images. secondly, it set the precedent for what i thought music and corresponding video should be-- bizarre, mysterious, and discomforting. i guess madonna really laid the groundwork for my future interest in music (there, i said it).

in some ways, this song could be in a better position on this list for its far-reaching impact, but i didn't even like the song then. and i certainly don't like it any more now.

fantastic (new) features

2007-08-01T20:02:00.000-04:00

so, i decided that i would add somemore stuff to change it up a bit (dont want things gettin stale). and i have had this idea for a while to compile "the songs that have changed my life" and write about them, and i guess this is a decent place to put all that (cause otherwise it would just go in the drawer or the shredder). so, starting tomorrow, i will be posting roughly a song a day (hopefully) to countdown to my number one (suspense). i dont know how many songs it will be, but i guess i will figure that out soon. also, i have realized i have poems of questionable value that strech back into my younger days that maybe could be brought up for a good laugh.

so yeah, look out for all that good stuff. but don't worry, my thoughtprovoking, mindblowing uptodate rambling will still be here. but now there will be diversity. and spice. and fire.

the pacific northwest

2007-07-31T21:32:00.000-04:00

though i have been fortunate to travel in america as far west as the coast of california and as far north as northern vermont, i have never visisted the summation of those two directions, namely the pacific northwest. it may seem odd, then, that i also happen to be obsessed with a corner of the nation i have never actually witnessed. in my heady teen years, i decided that it was seattle or bust after high school. i had put together in my mind a veritable wonderland of water, evergreens, towering peaks, gray skies, coffee shops. i would head there and start a really awesome indie rock band, maybe dye my hair green, and paint pictures with other likeminded souls. those who had visited seattle, like my sister, my cousin, friends, etc. said the place looked like it was right up my alley. so it was decided. that is where i would go.

my college application process followed the logic of pinning the tail on the donkey. so i applied to the university of puget sound,located in tacoma (for some reason not to the university of washington in seattle), among ten other places. i was accepted, but ultimately turned down the offer once i was informed school outside the lovely state of north carolina would not be funded by the higher ups. so i shrugged and told myself after college would be the time-- the apple in front of the dumb horse.

now, i am not sure if i will ever go up there. i almost don't want to. i am afraid. i am afraid that this place i had felt so strongly about, had constructed so well in mind would not meet my lofty expectations. i would get up there and it would be just like other places, i wouldn't start a band and i would work a desk job or whatever.

i may never get to seattle, but i guess i can always think of what it would be like to go there. i can always tell myself that one day when things are different, i will march that yellow brick road just like lewis & clark did and look down from the spaceneedle and see a kingdom of dreary perfection where i will write books and cure all the world's ills.

i think these kinds of places are important. somewhere that you may never really see but can imagine and create to be however you want it to be. maybe its the old grass is greener on the other side kind of thing. but i guess it's not so bad.

radio free n.c.

2007-07-30T20:51:00.000-04:00

i don't listen to the radio much, and that is by choice. on most stations, it seems like an endless cycle of overplayed, inoffensive music followed by irritating disc jockeys, screaming car ads, and lame-o station identifications. it wasn't always this way. growing up, i (unwillingly) listened to every oldies station eastern north carolina had to offer, and i actually learned to enjoy it. later on, i used to do homework listening to 96 rock every night (when it came in well all the way from raleigh). so i thought radio was cool-- i could hear new (at least to me) music and didnt have to go buy cds.

i don't know what happened, but at some point, some company bought some other companies and became like one gargantuan one, radios dials got shifted and we ended up with one station that played "more than a feeling" on repeat and of course 83 country stations.

so i got to work at davidson's radio station, which was awesome, cause i could play all this crap and make others listen to it (supposedly). so i figured i could do the same at carolina. well, i basically got laughed out of the room in my interview with the station there because so many of the bands i talked about were "just white people with guitars." so oh well.

i guess it is hard to find a happy medium among all people's tastes and interests, but i think we'd all be better off with more choices in radio stations (at least for those of us without satellite stuff). variety is the spice of life or whatever, so that would be a good policy to follow. not that i want to listen to mongolian post-polka played by blind children with sticks all the time, but i mean, there is a lot of good stuff out there and it'd be cool if it got played.

but nobody asked me.

feeding frenzy

2007-07-29T19:50:00.000-04:00

so i watch the food channel. a lot. so you think i would be able to cook at least something more complex, more gourmet than chef boyardee and turkey sandwiches. well i cant. and tonight proves it. i hit my max for food channel watching this morning and actually became inspired to make what i saw on the television. just buy the stuff, follow the instructions, and by some unknown magic i would see and taste the beauty i had seen so easily devised on the tube. sounds simple enough. so i went to the grocery store, picked up ingredients (lots of stuff i had never bought before) and patiently waited until it was time to do something with them. that's where the happy part of the story ends and gives way to bleeding hands, beet juice stains, herb overdoses, and that nagging gagging feeling.

perhpas beet and goat cheese salad and grilled zucchini wraps with goat cheese and herbs was not the best place for me to start my foray into cooking. but it sounded good. i will spare you the rest of the details, but suffice it to say, i am currently waiting for my stomach to stop churning, i have bandages on my fingers, and my hands are stained from both beet and blood. if anyone has any recipes that are easy, preferably that do not involve chopping parsley or cooking beets or anything with goat cheese, it would be much appreciated.

maybe there is life after college (it's lame)

2007-07-27T20:55:00.000-04:00

i don't know if it was just me, but for some reason the day after college graduation i thought i might die. perhaps it had to do with the fact my body was having trouble recovering from a four-day alcohol-induced fiasco. still, i felt like i was waiting around for a bomb to go off--hands over my ears, scanning the horizons for signs of my imminent demise. but, surprisingly, nothing happened. i didn't keel over. my house didn't explode. but i still wasn't convinced, even when i walked into a real adultworld job a week later.

i expected something to change. i was wearing a suit, i had a sweet manbag, and i had a desk and all: i'm different, i'm taller, i'm grown up. heck, i got my own health insurance and business cards. wow.

but of course, the inevitable happened. people asked what grade i was in, folks on the phone told me they needed to speak to a "responsible adult." then there is the time in the elevator. i happened to think i was looking quite sharp that day, but this older lady gets in, the door closes and she looks at me funny. "so. what school do you go to?" great. again. "actually, i just graduated from carolina." "oh," she says, "well maybe you should grow some facial hair or something." then the elevator dings, we arrive at floor 3 and she gets her elderly ass out of the lift. alone in the glass elevator i stare at my reflection and realize, yeah, maybe i should grow some facial hair (if only....). maybe i'm not really an adult. maybe not much has changed; i mean i still listen to crappy emo-ish music, i still watch abc family, i still wear my hair too long, and i still don't know what the hell i am doing. and that's okay. because dammit, i'm 23 not 44.

but the point of all this is twofold: graduating college does not equal immediate death (thought it may be lurking around every corner) and you are not a real adult at this ridiculous age, at least not yet. so in a lot of ways age 23 is like age 13, where everything was awkward, new-ish, confusing ("am i still a kid?"), etc. but the good part is, i'm not breaking out in zits, my voice isn't cracking (well, most of the time), and i don't play the trumpet in the parker middle school band.

so i guess the awkward, clumsy stuff is okay 'cause it is likely (hopefully) followed by years of awesomeness. and i can live with that. as long as i don't need braces.

the firstpost

2007-07-26T20:15:00.000-04:00

hello.

i am honestly not sure the point of all this is. my best guess is it is the result of an idling, narcissistic brain, but oh well. i do happen to enjoy writing and since pencilspenspaperbooks seem to be fading away, i guess this is a valid (modern) medium. i do have thoughts and opinions and things and i shall share them here. but then again, i may be the only person that reads this, which is fine. the key is tricking myself into believing i am validated by expressing myself in this way. but enough garble.

i can discuss/feel passionately about the following topics: music, people, zoo animals, funny stories, buffalo wings, the food network, humid summer days, unc basketball/football, eastern europe, reality shows, floats (both parade and aqua), complaining, and leather jackets.

so maybe i will talk about these things. maybe i won't. it happens.

but yeah, thanks for reading and let me know what you think (unless you have something mean to say because i am fragile).

P.S. Rest in peace, Skip Prosser.